The MOON Prince

Part 18

"Logan baby, I've made dinner. Come on." Kristina was calling me from outside the bedroom.

"Alright, coming."

Coming out, I noticed that she had set a table on the patio with candles surrounding it. There was a candle and a rose in the middle and sets of cutleries on two sides facing each other. It was beautiful it actually made me feel extra guilty. Because the person I want to be here with wasn't her.

It was a lovely night. The patio looking out onto the lake made a very peaceful and calm setting. You can hear the owls and other night critters singing the night away. The trees around the lake sways slowly and softly as if it were dancing to the sound of night. The half moon shined brightly against the dark sky.

She actually looked beautiful under the moonlight and the lighting from the candles around. It gave this romantic vibe around us and it was actually perfect; except for one thing.

I smiled at her, trying to appreciate her effort.

"It's beautiful, Krissie."

"Aw baby.. I'm really glad you liked it."

"I love it, Krissie." I walked towards her and kissed her in appreciative gesture. She deepened the kiss but I didn't feel much like it. I miss somebody's pair of lips and it wasn't the one I'm kissing right now. I feel so awful and guilty but I really can't help it. I am feeling totally lost right now.

"I'm glad you love it." She smiled brightly. I just returned the smile.

"Come on. I have all your favorites ready for you."

Looking around, I saw that she prepared lobster chowder for appetizer, mixed salad as a second dish, roasted pork and side dish spaghetti kung pao as main course and honeydew ice cream cake as dessert. The portion for myself on the main dish was like three person's serving.

"You sure know how to make my tummy happy." I smiled at her. I am sure I am hungry but it seems my appetite isn't that great for the night.

"Oh I remembered! 'Happy tummy, happy Logan'!" She repeated my own words and giggled. That was what I always said when she was surprised with the amount of food I always have.

Throughout the meal, I can't helped but reminisced about a certain someone. It's getting harder and harder with each passing seconds. I don't really know what it means for me, but right at that moment it feels like I wanted to just be alone. I'm not sure if the feelings I am having was commitment nervousness or other things but what I'm sure about was that I don't think I can go through with all the plans.

Kristina was happily bursting about her plans for our lives ahead. She looked so hyped and beaming. I feel awful but I tried to masked it by returning her smiles and tried to entertained her playful banters.

After our dessert, Kristina looked into my eyes and hold my hand.

"Logan baby, I know that this is too soon and I am not really sure how werewolves think about human marriages.."

She reached from behind her and took out a small case. Looking into my eyes she opened the lid. Inside was a pair of crafted golden ring.

"I know this is all too soon and we're too young. But I think it's not wrong for us to have... promised ring?" She was doubtful when she utters it that it breaks my heart a little.

Guilt and sadness hovers my heart and mind. I feel so awful that I don't think I can go through all these whatever that was we were planning. My mind was so confused and I feel guilty all day long.

"That's.. very sweet of you, Krissie. You know that you will always have a special place in my heart." I look at her, unsure whether to proceed with what I am about to say.

She looked at me with something akin to sorrow and a little bit of disappointment.

"I'm guessing there's 'but' coming along." She looked down.

I inhaled at her words. Looking at her, I tried to form the most suitable words without hurting much towards her. I held her hands which was holding my left hand.

"But.. I do think it's too soon. In fact, can I request for us to delay the marking? I am having a nervous breakdown and my mind is everywhere. I can't give myself to you in this condition, Krissie. If I wanted to be with you, I wanted to give you my all. No doubts, no hesitations and definitely no confusions. I don't want our future to be based on these.. uncertainty." I looked into her eyes deeply trying to read her. I exhaled my breathe which I didn't realized I held while I speak my mind.

"But Logan, we have planned this." She gave me a sorrow and worried look.

"Please Krissie, not tonight please?" I begged her again.

"You said you won't cancel this. You... you lied." Tears started to fill her eyes.

"I know.. I am sorry. Its just that.. I am.. confused. Please Krissie, let me think all this through?" I have hard time getting my words right. I feel awful but I don't think I can proceed with the plan.

Inhaling and wiping her tears, she looked at me straight into my eyes.

"Tell me you love me, like a lover, like a mate."

"Krissie, I..." I lost my words there. I don't think so I can tell her that.

"You never could say those words, could you?"

I gave her my sad expression silently begging her to try to understand me. She just sat there with stoic expression. I exhaled my breathe which I didn't realized I held while I speak my mind.

Kristina suddenly laugh.

"I thought getting rid of her will make you forget. I'm so stupid to ever believed that you ever loved me." She was now shaking her head. Disappointment was clear in her eyes.

I sat there confused about her first sentence but rushed my words to deny her second one.

"But I do! My gosh! I do loved you, Krissie."

"But it's never enough, right? Not as much as you loved your mate!" Her eyes turned dark.

My mate? What is she talking about. I have moved on from Jessica long ago.

I scrunched my eyebrows confused with her words. Just as I was about to ask her what she meant, she moved and chanted some unknown words and that's the last thing I remembered.