SPY-ISH → bts fanfiction

chapter four

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M.Y.G

I STARE at the yellowing wall paper. I can't believe I have to start over. The sun has risen now, and I'm wide awake again. New thoughts and realizations set in. The work I've meticulously prepared is gone now. I have to re-immerse myself. I have to reset all of my devices. I have to sink into the background of my new apartment building. I have to be re-forgotten by my neighbors. I have to find a new route to school. To work.

All because I couldn't stop myself from listening to a voice that wasn't even there.

"I need to sleep," I murmur to myself.

"I need to eat."

"I need..."

"I need to find her."

And the goal is fresh once again. I stand up, the mattress creaking. Without another word, I start setting up my computers again, sitting my screens against the walls, as I have no desk anymore. No more peeling, faux leather chair either. No matter. That just made me more tired. Sitting on the hard ground can help me focus.

I spend the next few hours rebooting my devices, making sure everything is in working order. I even forget I have a class. Once I do realize, I shrug it off and keep working. I've only missed class once before, when my body couldn't take anymore sleepless nights. When I'm finally finished, I realize I'm sweating. With a sigh, I peel off the gray t-shirt I think I've been wearing for the last three days.

I don't have any sort of soap, so I just rinse off in the shower. The water is cold, but I'm already numb. I don't notice.

When I'm finished, I pull out the cleanest shirt and jeans I can find and slip them on. Then I pull on a sweatshirt and grab some money. As much as I hate to do so, I know I need to buy food and toiletries. The morning sun almost blinds me as I step outside onto the balcony. Letting out a soft groan, I shove my hands into my pockets and head down the stone staircase.

Back into the noisy world.

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"Okay, so your total is 11733.81 won. Need a bag?"

The female cashier watches me expectantly. And it takes me a moment to register what she has said. Lack of sleep I suppose.

"Hm? Oh."

I fumble with my money a bit, then hand her the correct amount. I know I won't be needing change, so I grab the things and step away from the counter. Something irks me. Had she asked something else? I turn around to see her serving the next costumer, so I decide it isn't important. Then I walk out of the convenience store in relief. Ready to isolate myself as soon as possible.

A police car rolls by at that moment. A piercing sense of panic suddenly seizes me, and I shove what I can in my large sweatshirt pocket and flip on my hood. My heavy breathing doesn't cease until the cop is out of sight.

I feel stupid as I walk on. There is no reason for the police to apprehend me. And even if they do, at least my belongings will all be safe. I just have to keep my living locations a secret if I'm questioned. Allowing myself to relax just a bit, I stick my hands in my full pocket. I suddenly wish I had a bag for my things.

But my desire for this small thing is completely shoved aside when a great disturbance occurs. I'm suddenly being dragged off of the sidewalk and into an empty alley. In an instant, I'm suddenly confronted by something I've never dealt with before.