2:43 a.m. and i'm tossing and turning,
just woken up and my thoughts are concerning.
i don't know what's wrong as i lay in my bed,
thinking about how i'm better off dead.
i think of you as i sob in my room,
i wonder if i was gone, would you feel any gloom?
i think of my family and how they don't care,
would they even notice if i was not there?
i try not to scream as i'm crying with pain,
as i dig into my skin with a dull blade.
empty inside as the blood drops to the floor,
"if i cut deeper, i won't be here no more."
i don't want to live, but i'm too scared to die.
i'm too scared of life, but i'm still alive.
i lie to my therapist so she thinks i'm sane,
so she'll tell my parents and they'll think the same.
i'll sit through life trying to be okay,
but every night when you sleep, i'm going insane.
i'll lie to your face and i'll say that i'm fine,
when all that's on my mind is 100 ways to die.
YOU ARE READING
I'm Not Okay. I'm Sorry.
Poetrythis is just an outlet for some of my poetry and poetic thoughts. my mindsets and my perspective. i can tell you now that it won't all rhyme. don't expect perfection. enjoy, i guess. xx 💕
