Cluttered

I spoke/wrote this literally in the shower.

I wrote this story in the shower (well I spoke it out loud and then decided to write it down whilst in the shower..I literally took out my phone and typed it down while water was pouring down my naked self.) this story literally means nothing to my own emotions. Nothing has happed for me to feel this way. It was just like a character monologue I guess? Idk man. But I literally spoke this out loud so it sounds a lot better with emotion and a true voice I guess?? But enjoy this pointless free verse poem with no real meaning:)

——————

You sit at lunch with table full of friends
You say you are lonely
You say you've never had anybody..
You say she'll never see you
You say you have..nobody

You say you have nobody as I sit right in front of you
You say you have nobody as I'm constantly jumping through hoops just to even talk to you
You say you have nobody as I'm looking right at you
And you're looking at me
But not at me
Past me
At the girl behind me
Who's opaque

And she's looking at you
But not at you
Past you
At the guy who's behind you
Who's opaque

You say you talk to her
But to her
Your words become blank as she
She stares at your lips

You say nobody cares..not even her
But when I talk to you. I hear you.
I don't stare hungrily at your lips searching for sex

When I talk to you
I'm looking right at you
Not at the guy past you
At you
As you are opaque to me
Because I know what it's like
To bleed.