Canadian heart break (A Tom Hiddleston story)

Shocking kisses

3 days later
*Tom*
"So I am free to go home now and .. well.. wait ?" I ask the doctor, who just checked the thing taped to my chest. It is a kind of a pacemaker, but it contains of a thin electric wire in my heart, put in yesterday through a very small hole. And a kind of patch on my chest. It is linked to what looks like a pager. It will monitor my heart rate and give an alarm if it gets to high. If it gets really bad it will shock me.

The doctor nod. "Remember to cover the patch with one of the band aids when you shower. And of course contact us if anything changes at all".

"I learned my lesson". I say with a bitter-sweet smile. "But what can and can't I do ? I mean I know I need to relax, but I am also supposed to stay healthy right ?"

The doctor smiles and glance at Kitty. I get a feeling he knows what I am really asking. "Well you can do what your heart can take. If the alarm goes off, you are pushing it and need to slow down. Everything you can do without triggering the alarm is fine".

"Will it hurt if it shocks me ?" I can't help asking. I mean it is a weird thought that I have a wire inside my heart that will shock it if necessary.

He nods. "It will be unpleasant and can hurt a bit. But hopefully it won't come to that, the alarm will warn you in most cases before it gets to that".

"And it is better than the alternative". Kitty says, sending me a soft smile. She has been so strong, so brave these past days. I wish I could shelter her from any hurt.

I get my things, part of me is ecstatic to get home. But my mom and sister will arrive later today and I will have to tell them everything, that part won't be fun at all.

*Kitty*
As we arrive home Athena comes charging, throwing herself into Tom's arms. "You came home.. I was scared your heart was to sick".

"Of course I came home sweetie".  He says softly, lifting her up to hug her tightly to him, and she winds her arms around his neck.

I walk over to Zac and Laura. They have been so great taking care of Athena and everything. "Thank you, both of you. I hope she have behaved okay".

"She has been an absolute pleasure". Laura says smiling. "She is such a sweet kid. No the only trouble maker has been Zac".

I look at Zac who looks absolutely innocent and I giggle. "Oh that I can believe". Making him pout and look very insulted.

"I better go get some lunch ready. Tom's family will arrive in about an hour". I say, looking at my watch. I have met them before, but as his friend. Do they approve of me being his girlfriend ? Will they blame me for his injury ?

Laura shakes her head. "Go take a warm shower and relax a bit. Me and Zac can handle lunch". She says smiling and Zac nods. Then she holds out her hand to Athena. "Come on sweetie, you can help too".

"Thank you". I say as they disappear into the kitchen. Then Tom grabs my hand pulling me to the bedroom.

As soon as we are inside he has me up against the door, he looks at me biding his lip. "Damn I have been waiting to do this for days".

"Tom be careful.. you need ..". I am cut of by his mouth on mine, kissing me like there is no tomorrow and damn I missed it.

Suddenly Tom jumps back like he was zapped, and well he literally was. He is clutching his chest, slumping over slightly. "Fucking shit that hurt".

"Are you okay love ?" I run to him. Us kissing had been enough to set of the pacemaker, it hadn't even given a warning first. This isn't good.

He shakes his head, brushing of my hand when I try to touch him. "No.. of course I am not okay, I fucking can't even kiss you without my heart going haywire and shocking the shit out of me".

"I.. I'm sorry". I feel the tears burn behind my eyes and my voice is breaking. It is hard enough that we can't be physical, that I risk losing him every single day. But the way he brushed me of when I wanted to comfort him broke my heart.

He is kind of hugging himself. Then he looks up and he hurries over to pull me into his arms. "Oh Kitty I am so sorry. I didn't meant to brush you of like that. It's just the thought of not kissing you for a long time, maybe ever again it hurts so much".

"It is not forever". I tell him, resting my head on his chest. Listening to his heartbeat. It is strong but rather uneven. "You will get a new heart, no matter what".

"You know you can't promise me that kitten. No one can. But thank you for trying to cheer me up". He says softly. Kissing the top of my head.

I snuggle into him. "I have to believe it. If I stop believing in it I think I will go insane. I couldn't even think that it might not happen".

"Darling I hate saying this, but it might not happen and I need you to promise me that if it don't happen, you will move on and be happy. I don't want you throwing away your life mourning me. You need to go and be the mother Athena deserves". He says softly.

I shake my head against his chest. "Don't say that Tom. Please don't tell me to just forget you and please stop sounding like there is no hope".

"We need to be realistic here kitten". He holds me out from him, looking into my eyes. "My odds are not good".

I put my hands on his cheeks. "My brain knows that Tom. But my heart needs to believe. I don't want to be realistic. Please let me keep my hope".

"If you promise to hope for us both". He says with a small smile and kisses me softly. Making me close my eyes and just enjoy his lips on mine.

When he lets me go I reach up to gently caress his cheek. "I better go take that shower now. See you downstairs after I guess".

"Well I think I am going to join you". He says and when I look at him he chuckles. "I promise no hanky panky. Water and electric shocks is a bad combo".