The Future Freaks Me Out.

I

I was born on a probably cold day in Buenos Aires.
And since I was breathing, I knew I was gay.

I even remember telling that to my father. And I still remember what he said.

I would die if you were gay.

And that stood me for a long time. 8 years to be more precise.
I need 8 fucking years to build the courage to came out as what I was: A man who loved another man. It's just that fucking simple.

But in the meantime, I spend everyday of my life unhappy, feeling like a lie because I was hiding a part of who I'm, an intrensical part of who I'm, and I was scared. Scared of them finding it out.

I still recall every time my mother asked me to talk. How scared I was that she had, finally, found out my darkest secret.

And that was just the beginning of a long, exhausting and frightening fight about who I was and what I wanted to be.

Needless to say, I'm approaching 18 and living happily as a out of the closet gay man. But it didn't come for free.

I suffered for it but I fought for it.
People have done things to me for it that no one should ever be allowed to do, to anybody.

It took me to the darkest of the corners, to the deepest of the depressions.

But that's a story for another time.

Until then,
Take care.

-F.