I took two Xanax and closed my eyes and then opened my eyes again at what felt like twelve hours later. Drugs are sort of cool that way.
Sunset, or just after sunset, and then I realized it was actually just before dawn, and I knew that something wasn't right. My bag of pills was gone and I had pissed and shit myself.
I crawled out into a fog of sprinklers. My mouth was as dry as it's ever been. I needed water, but not sprinkler water. I stumbled through the landscaping wondering why I hadn't been mutilated as well as robbed, heading in the direction where I thought a convenience store would be. Convenience stores are a staple in these parts.
Sure enough, I soon found a 7 Eleven.
"I just need some tap water," I said to the clerk who was placing breakfast burritos in the heat case. "I'll go. I won't bother you.You got a restroom?"
He was a Hawaiian or Indian kid, and he had his hand over his nose. I was confused at first, then I remembered how I'd shit and pissed myself. He said, "No restroom, here. Here."
He scurried to the wall, keeping his eyes on me, and scurried back,handing me a Big Gulp with ice water, still with his hand over his nose. "Now go. Or wait. I could take you to the side and run the hose on you."
Outside again, now with water in my system offering greater clarity, I saw that I'd puked on myself real good too. Maybe several times. I had eaten a ton of chow at the hospital before it was time to go, knowing I wouldn't be getting food so good again until at least until Thanksgiving, when the celebrities show up on Skid Row with bright shiny smiles and grass-fed turkey.
YOU ARE READING
THE DOG HUNTERS (completed)
General FictionA suicidal homeless weirdo has adventures. He runs into a duo of dog lovers, who spend their days traveling around the city observing and honoring dogs. Wisdom cannot be run away from. He escapes paradise and falls in love with a strange lady who m...
