Who said a girl can't love again || Baekhyun fanfic

-sad scarf-

Haneul's POV

Sadness envolepped me like a big scarf , it took over my body and my senses, it hurts, as if someone had stabbed me and made sure the cut was deep, it wasn't going to cure fast and i knew it , i felt like i wanted to scream from the top of my lungs but i had no energy to do it , my throat was sore and my emotions were all mixed up , it felt as if i lost someone who wasn't coming back,and it was the case somehow , i couldn't tell but i could feel that this pain will be everlasting .

I told myself that i needed to talk to Kris yet my hand wouldn't reach for the phone .

I spend the rest of my day in the bed , i couldn't leave my room and i wasn't willing to, i know that i won't be able to face anyone for reasons i was ignoring and that what had made me even more confused , it was bizarre how things flipped from top to bottom rashly , i knew when dad had told me about kris' mother , i knew that even if i tried to talk or convince them that my love for him was something i couldn't stop , but i also was aware that they wouldn't listen , cousin marriage in our families was something inappropriate here ,especially that kris' father had no idea his wife was my mother's sister , i wanted to know more but how am i going to be able to listen and accept the fact that i can't love kris anymore , i had no idea whether kris knew or not , but i was surely afraid of his reaction, and at the same time i wanted to know his reaction, i was willing to see him one more time but every time i remembered that it was possible i'd break down and i'd let my feelings control me .

The worst thing was that i couldn't blame anyone , maybe it was fate , but how could fate be so rude to me , and take from me the happiest thing that was filling my emptiness , i had realised that kris filled that empiness in my heart , he is my first love and the way he convinced me into getting together with him was the reason why i committed myself to love him , the idea of us setting apart made me shudder badly , having those thoughts stuck in my head just made me more depressed and made the cut deeper i suppose.

Junmyeon came to check on me several times , but i pretended to be asleep , preventing any conversation with anyone , i knew they would comfort me, i needed comfort but i didn't like anyone to see me in that state,it was a matter of time when i decided to check from my window , it was dark and i realised i hadn't ate anything since breakfast but i had no appetite , i gave up on answering whether tomorrow would be better because it seemed like it was impossible to come up with an answer unless tomorrow comes ,hopefully a better day.

Haneul's eyes became red and puffy from crying, it was night and she hasn't thought about checking her phone until she heard her cellphone beeping, she was too lazy to get up , but she fought it and got on her feet reaching out to grab it ,she saw kris' name on the screen of her phone , she felt her heart sinking within every second , she held herself from crying hardly , a hand on her mouth .

She hesitated , before answering , she was trembling , as tears formed on the corner of her eyes, threatening to fall in any minute but finally after a few seconds which were countable , she answered.

"Hello!",she answered her voice shaking almost whispering, she was obviously trying hard not to show kris anything

",Haneul, i was worried about you , where have you been the whole day ,are you okey ?",kris was obviously worried ,he was waiting impatiently for her answer , but he sounded as if he was utterly clueless.

Haneul took a deep breath but her tears had fell, within the moment kris spoke , she was sobbing quietly but managed to say almost choking "fine,and you ?", tears sliding down her cheeks , as if they were set free, after being prisonned , but who she is hiding from , kris had felt by the moment she answered that she wasn't okey and she was claiming to be ,

"Haneul, don't lie to me , i can feel it , i can sense that you are not fine and when you aren't fine , i am not either , tell me what's wrong ",

now that kris had asked , she wasn't going to hide it , she fell next to the bed sitting against it crying loudly and sobbing , she couldn't answer ,

"Daddy's little girl is sad " ,Haneul finally spoke wiping her tears, kris liked calling her Daddy's little girl , she was recalling the days when he use te tell her that she was his little girl ,

"Haneul i am coming, that's it , you are home right? ,I'll be there in no time ,just wait for me "

kris can't come to her house , her father would see him and would tell him everything and break his heart , but it's not what she wanted she spit out

"no kris , don't come here , please don't , i am begging you not to",

"Haneul i can't not come , please i want to see you , let me come ", kris was the one begging this time and was insisting , Haneul knew there was no way she could change his mind , because he wanted to see her , so she thought about it for a while and said " let's meet at the park , we use to meet when we started dating , i will be there in ten minutes ", there was no way kris would argue with that , he was way too concerned about her , he couldn't stop thinking about what could have happened , to let Haneul sound that way , six months might not be that much , but kris knew Haneul through that time so well and he bet she did too ,

"okey , see you there ", he hang up as soon as he said .

Haneul held the phone to her heart , tears still coming out , she was thinking about what she could tell him , but the only right thing to do was to tell him the truth , nothing but the truth .

the font is messy but anyways , here is another silly chapter !