I know I talk about the past a lot. I know I talk about the things that haunt me, and hurt me. It's a part of who I am. Another part of who I am is a weak little girl. Struggling on the inside. And then I think about how harming used to be an option. I used to think it would make everything better. But I almost died. Remember how I said I was scared of death? That's why. The past has scarred my mind, and body. While I do miss HIM, I need to move on with my life. I have found someone new and there is nothing that I would change in my life at the moment. My best friend wasn't at work two days ago. I hope he is ok. I miss him too. But I work tomorrow so hopefully I'll get to see him. That's the only thing I look forward to during the week. Well that and seeing my dearest love. I need to be able to see him more than 2 hours and 30 min each week. Why is the world against me? My scars aren't UGLY. My scars are BEAUTIFUL. I'm crazy right? That's what you're thinking? Damn right I am. My scars remind me of the past and how while yes, I was weak, and I used to hurt. A lot. But who would I be if I didn't have MY own past. The world works in mysterious ways. If I could go back in time, I would go back to seventh grade and take back my worst mistake ever. Being friends with a bitch. Because even though I would've been lonely, that would've been better than getting a new friend who just leaves me in the end. And turns on me. I can't deal with it anymore. But I will. Because remember my biggest fear? It's always there.
YOU ARE READING
The diary of a depressed teen.
PovídkyContains depression, suicidal thoughts, self-harm references, and my strong opinions about everything I'm angry about at the time of which I write each chapter. This is just how I feel my life is going right now.
