They Say Quitters Never Win

Woke up in wrong side of reality

As soon I opened my eyes I can see white everywhere, and gosh whatever is happening right now it feels so nice, I kept staring at ceiling drifting and enjoying this new feeling.
"Patrick?"
It took long for me to turn around and I saw Joe standing there, I didn't reply back I was afraid that it will cut the euphoria state am in.
He chuckled and start patting my head "you're so out of it, but it's alright, it's the morphinling we had to give it to you"
I thought to myself ah so that's what its, well I hope they keep it going
Joe: "I saw you screaming in the end thinking that there is one tribute remaining but the truth is, that the guy from district 9 died while you were passed out in the cave, so Andy was the last one"
I nod slowly, ah so that what happened, for some reason am so calm?, I can't remember when the last time I felt that way, even before this whole hunger games thing I never felt this calm.
Joe: "when you get better we have to start the victor tour"
I nod again, sure whatever can I get back to dozing off.
Soon my family entered the room and Joe left so they can have some privacy.
Mom: "Patrick! Baby how you are feeling? Are you alright? And how is your shoulder and feet"
She was already in question number 20 while am still trying to answer the first one.
Father: "thank you, thank you so much, am so glad that you made it son, now all you have to do is to get better and soon you will be home with us"

They wanted to stay more but the doctor asked them to leave so I can rest which am glad he did.

It's been two weeks now and my foot and shoulder are much better, but the thing that still bad is the morphinling.

I can't help it, I need it now I feel like am losing my mind without it, I start to freak out and become scared from everything around me when it starts to wear off, I don't care how they give it to me whether in syringe or pills as long I can have it.

But the doctors keep refusing saying that I don't need it anymore, but I DO NEED IT , so I keep losing my temper and scream in rage for it , but they still won't!
Thankfully Pete came to my room and as soon I saw him I started "please, please tell them they don't understand how much I need it" and start crying
Pete: "need what?"
Patrick: "the MORPHINLING!, everything still hurt I Need it and they don't LISTEN!"
He hugged me and patted my back "shhhh its okay, you're going to be alright the doctors said that soon they will discharge you, I can bring you what you want anytime you like, but that if you remember our deal"
Deal yea I remember that I live with him, will if he can provide me with the pills without these doctor stopping him then I would do it for sure so I nod enthusiastically.
Pete: "you will do it?"
Patrick: "do you promise that you will bring it to me all the time"
Pete: "yes"
Patrick: "but now they are asking me to go back to the victor village for filming then the victor tour will start"
Pete: "I will come along & give you enough amounts for that and after you done with the tour you are going back home with me"
I nod, I need him and that's not just for the morphinling I want to have someone by myside.

After Pete finished my discharging papers we took off to the victor village by the train, I was more than calm now that I had my dose, Joe came along as he live in the victor village too
He came to the dining area with his drink and start pouring for us
Joe: "so we are neighbors now! You know now I realize we didn't celebrate your win, since you were in the hospital, but don't worry in this tour we will party all night for 2 week with endless supply of drinks"
I didn't reply just sitting and enjoying that relaxing feeling all over again,
Pete: "I went to your house while you were in the hospital to check, I didn't like the interior so I made some changes, and also do you still like to draw? I brought the drawing Table and other equipment you need, thought it would be a good idea to do it when the camera start"
I nod and said "yes, drawing I like it"
Joe keep looking at us suspiciously, I know he didn't like the whole dealing with Pete but there was no choice and now he is with us all the time probably start to wonder what did we agree on that day, and what are we in the first place.
Well it doesn't matter, but honestly this is still weird for me the whole I don't care about anything at all, but am loving every part of it.
Patrick: "Are my pets there? So Vikki can play with them while I draw"
They stared at me shockingly and when Joe was about to say something Pete stopped him and said: "Vikki is traveling with her family now, but it's okay I will ask someone to bring your pets"
I laughed and "what are you talking about? She is right here? I pointed at Vikki she smiled at me"
I looked at Pete and Joe, they were staring at each other but didn't say any thing
I smiled and kept looking at the window as that the only thing I can do these days , even though am tired I can't sleep at all for some reason, and though the table is filled with all kind of food I don't feel hungry.
But then again I don't mind

After we arrived to my house I found Hayley there talking to other employees, mention where they should put the cameras
The house or the mansion is so beautiful! Too bad I can't live here

While I was having my house tour, Pete came with my dog Penny, I screamed "Penny!" and hugged it gosh I miss him so much

Pete: "you know the house is really nice we can use it when we make our visit here"
Patrick: "yes it is beautiful"
We kept walking around and went to the garden and remembered the day we made the deal, then I decided it's time to talk about it.
Patrick: "you know I was thinking, about the moving with you thing, I still don't understand why?"
Pete: "because I want you to stay with me"
Patrick: "but for what reason you want that"
Pete sighed and clearly debating if he should say it or not, "Listen the capital sees people as their property alright, and just because you win this doesn't mean you are free from them, remember the interview about you and Bob apparently you caught the attention of a lot of perverts there, all of them went to president snow asking him to order the Game Maker to help you win so later ......, let's say enjoy your company"
Patrick: "what that supposed to mean?"
Pete: "God Dammit you really don't understand?!, they wanted to prostituted to the wealthy Capitol citizens, same thing that happened to some of the tributes who won before"
Wait they can do that? Support or chose who win the game based in there opinion? Then why the hell this game happens if they can chose who they want? And wait what? Prostitution! "This is not fair!, and I won't do it! They can't force me!"
Pete: "yes they can, they will threat you in killing your family if you don't do as they say"
I start to cry I can't believe that after all of this I thought everything will be okay "what am I going to do? I don't want this please"
Pete: "this is exactly why I want you to live with me, I went to president snow and asked him, well to be frank begged him that you will belong to me only and that he won't use you for other people pleasure, so he thankfully he approved but still I want you next to me as I don't know what can happen when you alone"
I nod "thank you, thank you so much, but why you are protecting me?" I know that he is a sadist so making him beg even if it's for the president will burn him inside out and I don't remember that we were that close so that he do that for me.
He used to scare me, so I try my best to avoid him by taking my time in the bathroom or act busy with something, so why he would do this?.

Pete: "let's say I had my fare share watching the capitol turning people to monsters, and regardless to what happened to you in the hunger games which I understand anyone will show his claws when pushed into corner" he came closer and patted my head and said "I like you and I don't want them to hurt you more than they already did, I still don't care about the rest though",
I started to get confused I have no Idea what he is talking about, what I did in the hunger games? I know I was there and I know I won, but I keep getting dizzy every time I try to remember what happened in between, later Hayley came asking to get ready for the filming.

Which mean a lot of make up since I had eye bags and dark circles due to lack of sleep and multi-layer cloth to hide my new sickly figure.
So the filming started and we have to act as happy as we can my family came my Mom was making dinner my dad and brother are having a conversation, I was drawing my pets and Vikki while she is playing with them, and Joe watching me drawing and drinking from his mug, which am sure it's not coffee.

The filming is done and the dinner was ready, Pete joined us as he can't show up in front of the camera or people will know there is something fishy about my win, as they are not smelling it already.
They kept talking together, I couldn't follow up with their conversation, I know they were thanking Pete with his help for the leg brace and the ointment, I have a feeling that they wish they can tell him not to take me along but he is the vice president son so it will be like a suicide if they didn't do as he want.

Suddenly I felt nauseated so I ran to the bathroom and vomit, the sad thing I didn't even eat, my health keep getting worse.
Pete rushed behind me then waited for me at the door, after am done he took me to the bedroom and left me to rest but I wish I can sleep, I know it's a side of effect of the morphinling but still even without it I can't, I keep getting nightmares all the time or flashback, as am not sure what's real and not anymore.