Liquor {Yoongi}

The fight and the knife

The apartment had fallen silent for so long now, I wasn't even sure if Yoongi was here anymore. The only sound going trough my ears was the sounds of my own heavy breathing. I hadn't been able to stop the tears from rolling down my cheeks. I was surprised over how much I was actually able to cry out.

I was just disappointed over myself. I thought I had made an ok life for myself. But my mother had proven me wrong in just twenty minutes. It was like a light went on in my head. I had realized that I hadn't gotten anywhere in life.

Just saying those words in my head made me cry even harder.

I stood in the kitchen chopping up a salad. The food we bought for the dinner was cold now and only brought bad memories and bad luck.

Footsteps made their across the living room making the floors creak. The footsteps stopped as Yoongi leaned against the door frame with his arms crossed over his chest. His figure gave me the feeling of not quite knowing what to do. I didn't know what to do with myself either.

No words were spoken as there wasn't a point to say anything. No words would make me feel any better right now. And I think Yoongi had said all of his reassuring words, there wasn't any words left for him to say.

He sighed besides me as I pretended not to notice him. He walked passed me and changed his position to lean against the counter right beside where I was making my food. I still looked down at my hands, with my vision slightly blurred by the tears who constantly overflowed in my eyes.

"You can't keep beating yourself up like this" Yoongi said breaking the long silence we had been able to make between us.

"I'm not beating myself up. I'm just thinking about how true my mother was and that I need to think about my life choices" I said back with a shaky voice, not looking at him since I knew that would make him have a lot more to say.

"What have you done that is so bad? Or what you haven't done for that matter"
Yoongi asked sternly.

I stopped my chopping. I tried to think of there was another reason for my sudden outburst of tears and emotions. But the only thing that came to mind was my mothers damning words.

"Didn't my mother make it pretty clear. I think she would have a lot of reasons to why I should beat myself up for everything" I said starting to cut my vegetables up again. Right now I didn't need Yoongi to stand besides me and lecture me about how I should be happy with my life and all of that. It was easy for him to say. It wasn't so easy for me right now. To hear your rich boyfriend tell you that what you have is enough, when your boyfriend has what you have just a thousand times better.

"Well maybe I have a suggestion that could take your mind off these thoughts" he now started to suggest. if it was the vacation I really didn't feel like talking about it right now. I didn't need a reminder that Yoongi was going to pay for my trip since I couldn't pay for myself.

"What is it?" I asked in a happier tone trying to seem intrigued by his words.

"I'm not going back to my old house to live there" he started. I raised my eye brow down at the vegetable I was cutting in half.

"What does that mean?" I asked not understanding where he was going with this.

"I thought maybe we could go and look at a house together" he said. I could hear the happiness in his voice, but I didn't see or hear the excitement in it.

"You want me to go look at houses you may by for yourself?" I questioned turning my head slightly towards him.

"No Candice, I want us to go and look at houses together and find one we two can live together in" his words made me swallow harshly. I stopped my chopping resting my hand with the knife in on the counter. I looked up at him with what I can only say was disappointed eyes.

"I've just been yelled at for living in a horrid apartment, and the reason for that is because I don't have money. And now you want us to buy a house?"
I questioned him harshly.

"Candice-" he started but I quickly interrupted the words he was going to say as I didn't want to hear them.

"I know what you're going to say. You want to buy it"

"How do you think that makes me feel, I knowing I can't buy myself anything. I want to pay for my vacation and help out with the house, but I can't ok?!" I said raising my voice harshly at Yoongi. My anger had made my head slip up into another place, I didn't notice my hand had slipped the knife between my fingers and cut me over the palm of  hand.

"Shit" I cursed looking at my hand and quickly closing it.

"Are you ok?" Yoongi asked rushing to move the knife away and grabbed my hand that was now curled up into a fist.

"Yes I'm fine" I said in a low voice.

"It doesn't look like it" he commented.

"I'm fine" I said harshly as the tears begged to run down my cheeks again.

"No you're not. Where's your first aid kit?" He questioned me looking around the kitchen for something.

"In the bottom drawer" I said looking towards the drawer behind me. Yoongi nodded and let go of my hand walking away to get the first aid kit.

"Go and sit down" he instructed and I followed what he had said. I made my way across the room and into the living room where the table and chairs stood from previously. I said down on the chair my father had previously sat in.

The pain in my hand started to actually make me notice it. Blood had filled my hand in the inside and was now dripping down onto the floor.

Yoongi made his was into the living room with a wet towel in one hand and the first aid kit in the other. I looked at him with tearful eyes and he sighed sitting down in front of me.

"Open your hand" he instructed and I did. I opened my hand and the pain rushed trough my body making me hiss.

Yoongi placed the towel on my hand and dabbed softly on my hand to clean it up.

"I know you don't want any words from me about this, and you probably don't think I understand you" he started looking down at my hand on what he was doing. But my eyes were glued the figure of him.

"But I do know what I'm talking about Candice" he said as he looked up at me with his dark brown eyes and I almost lost my breath by the way he looked at me.

"I grew up very poor and that continued far into my young adult life, but I was lucky enough to be able to make music my job and make some money of it" he explained as I carefully watched him clean my hand up. I really didn't know or think that he would be the kind of person to have grown up that way.

Yoongi laid the towel aside and opened up the first aid kid up. The took out a very large bandage and placed it over my palm.

"And I know for sure that money can't buy you happiness. You've seen how I've been even with all the money and things I have." He said looking up at me with soft eyes and I gave him a soft smile and nodded.

"Don't measure your happiness in your  accomplishments and the money you've earned" he said and he gave my hand a kiss standing up. I stood up with him as he took the hand that wasn't cut in his and played with my fingertips. I looked up at him as he now stood inches away from me.

"I love you regardless of how much is in your bank account ok?" He joked with a smile on his face. I let out a low laugh liking the sound of what he had said. I guess he was right. As long as I had someone who loved me like he loved me, it was more than enough.

A/N
I know I didn't update yesterday, but I was busy reading the whole day. It was the most intense ff I've found in a long time so I had to finish it. So I wrote a little longer of a chapter to make it up to you guys 💕 (remember to vote!)