I Loved You First || danisnotonfire

eighteen - The Day After

Phil keeps me in his room the next morning while he tells Dan what happened. All I hear through the door is a series of "what" "oh my god" and "fuck". 

I do wish that they wouldn't make such a big deal of it, because they'll keep talking about it and I'm already horrified, but they should focus on the fact I'm okay, not on what could've happened. 

Phil later comes into my room with a tray with a plate of bacon, eggs, and pancakes. I smile at him and take the tray. Phil sits next to me on the bed while I eat. 

"Is Dan okay?" I ask him. 

He shrugs, "I don't know. He stormed into his room after I told him."

I nod, "I'll talk to him after I eat, okay?"

Phil nods, "Okay. We're staying home today, alright?"

I nod again and Phil leaves me to eat alone. After I finish I set the tray on the ground next to the bed and knock on Dan's door before entering. I see Dan emotionless on his bed, his eyebrows furrowed in thought. I move slowly next to him, and poke him on the cheek. 

"Dan?" I ask, sitting next to him. 

"I hope you know I'm banning you from ever going outside ever again," he replied.

I didn't know if I should smile or not, so I just suck on my lip, "I have to go outside, Dan."

"You don't necessarily have to," he says.

"God Dan, I think I know how to go outside without that happening again," I say.

"Yeah, well you went alone last time and where did that get you," he snapped. 

I scoff, "At least it didn't get that far!" 

"But what if it did, Fiona? You're like my sister, I can't have you going out without our knowledge and getting lost and then almost getting raped!"  

"But I didn't get raped," I state again. 

"But you almost did, Fiona. He almost completely stripped you. What would he have done if you didn't get away? He might have killed you."

"But I didn't-"

"Fiona would you shut up!" Dan shouts. 

My lip starts quivering after that, "Fuck you. I seriously mean it Dan. Fuck you." 

I stomp out of Dan's room, slamming his door back closed behind me.

"Phil?" I shout, walking towards his room. 

"Yeah?" I hear him respond. 

I bite my lip for a second, "I'll be in my room. I'm going to be uh...filming a video for the next hour or so. Don't interrupt me. Tell Dan the same." 

Phil's head sticks out of his room, "Okay, call me if you need help with the camera or something." 

"Thanks Phil," I murmur as I turn back around and walk to my room. 

I grab my suitcase from my top shelf and sigh as I turn back around to my drawer. I don't know what I was thinking, I thought I just needed to get away from a while because of stress. And I could go away now, I needed to. 

I threw a couple sweaters and tank tops into the bag, followed by countless pairs of skinny jeans and shorts. I grab a few pairs of shoes and jackets,  Mockingjay, followed by my iPad and laptop. I then close and zip up my bag and go for a second one filled with chargers and other things. 

Then I grab my phone and unlock it, and then I realize how much I'm shaking. I take a few deep breaths before going to my contacts and pressing Cat's number.  

She picks up on the third ring, "Hey Fiona! How are you?" 

I chuckle awkwardly, "Hey Cat. I uh, I'm actually not the best right now, and I called to ask you something." 

"Aw, what's happened? And of course, what's up?" 

"I uh...I was wondering if I could stay with you for a while? A month at the most," I told her. I avoided the question, I'd tell her if I could stay. 

"Of course! I'd love the company around. When should I pick you up?" Cat asked me. 

I shrugged, "I uh, tomorrow I guess. I'll text you, this is as sudden to me as it is to you." 

"Are Dan and Phil coming?" Cat questions. 

I bite my lip and forcefully shake my head, "No. Just me. I thought we could have girl time? I need girl time. I mean, if it's okay with you?" 

"Of course, Fiona. I love hanging out with you! I like girl time too! Oh it's going to be so fun! You and I could go shopping, and go to Cheesecake Factory, I could make you like pancakes..." Cat began to ramble. 

"Yeah, yeah that sounds great Cat. Um, I'll text you all the information. Sorry again, I need to get away from a few things for the moment and this is really the only thing I could think of doing," I mumble. 

"It's fine, Fi. I'll see you then, bye!" Cat exclaims. 

I just hang up and then slip my phone in the pocket of the jeans I'd never bothered to take off since yesterday. 

I felt bad going behind Dan and Phil's back, and if they're worried about me being out in the same country as them, I know they aren't going to be the chirpiest about unexpectedly upping and going to America for a month. 

The rest of the night I buy the plane tickets and prevent Dan from coming into my room or talking to him. 

I text Cat the time I was going to be there and then I fall asleep. 

And this is what happens when I try to write a forced update that I've been holding in for the past month or whenever the last time I updated was.  I'm not returning yet, this is really an 'yeah I'm going to be away for a while and I'm an asshole for liking other things' update. Which I tried to make good, but you know, I suck at writing anyway. So uh...yeah?

I've decided to either make the story shorter than planned and just end it earlier than expected, or just discontinue it. I don't know yet, because if I continue the wait between each update would take about a month? And if I just discontinue, I'll feel like literal shit.

Tell me what you think in the comments.

Once again, I'm sorry this chapter isn't the best, and I hope to be back soon. Peaceskies.