"Or were they created by nothing,or were they the creators of themselves?"
-(At-tur:35)-Al-Qur'an
His every words began to revolve in my head bringing to the far destination of truth.Or false which i could say?Confusions veiled me.The more thought i give it the more it become difficult to comprehend the truth.Something in the pit of the chest squirming me to believe but the heart could only understand,it wiping out every proofs making howls of rebuffs.I'd be living as a Hindu but i never believed on god.From the time i've started to collect knowledge,i understood the religion i've been following belongs to our parents and their Foundations.Never i took care on how it works nor i disliked.And i love the religion Islam also but just looking at their culture and habitual of prayer.So the life i had been living can be called an atheist.I don't believe in any god,i'm Hindu just because i've parents coming from the root of Hinduism.
What i did believe was every religions was made of people.I do believe in it today also. So it different for me to now comprehend the real and unreal.The feeling i'm having now is obscuring me.The worst is thinking the life i'd been living is actually a fault.As i said the heart couldn't take this innerfeelings against me making me more troubled on the situation.
I've been collecting information from online by the time i returned home.And i got many verses and the Hadiths with the meanings.As a doc,i never depended on the internet to collect information as it mostly contains several false information and i want proofs,the internet has the collections intervened by people.So it did give me more knowledge but i'm resistant to believe everything.
"Have you seen a snake or something?"
I glanced at paayal who's been sitting near me on the bed.I didn't notice her coming.Her face express mockery which explains her remark on my expression.
"Yes i saw you on the animal planet",i retorted back.I can never stop my mouth from retorting back to whoever beats sarcastic or mean comments to me.
knowing her sister very well she brought a serious face now," Ok so you haven't completely been out of place.Then what's reason for that diarrhea face you've been keeping?"
"Eeww watch your language"
"What??You're a doctor.You must be accustomed to these words.And i haven't said a word out of vocabulary".
"Ok stop.I'll tell you what's matter if you keep this shitty mouth shut",i wanted to tell this badly to somebody other than my friends.My trio friends have been saying same to me from the time i stepped out of the mosque that 'think about it..You'll know,you'll come to realize' and i'm really got tired of thinking when i can't even point out what's going in my mind properly.
"There..You followed me sister",She smiled on her victory and put the index finger on her lips when she saw my serious expression.We were always the snake and mongoose.Still we are.
"How can i tell you my problems if you haven't even tell me about your friends and the interesting hot topic discussed in that mobile of yours"
"You're my big sister but don't try to act like a big brother"
"But sisters share everything".
She kept a thoughtful face for a time then said,"Ok i agree.I'll tell you my matters a little if you tell me yours"
"A little?"
"Yes a little.Thank god for i'm even letting you hear my matters otherwise i don't like to share my thoughts and matters to anyone"
"To anyone,not to your friends also?"
"I haven't got truthful,lovely, amazing,wonderful and O-so-perfect friends like you"
YOU ARE READING
My Heart is All Yours
SpiritualFinding the people whom she loved the most accusing her for the good she did and falling to the victim of false she didn't do,Aastha aka Aysha a converting muslimah watched the closest of the people by bond hating her,even after played by the people...
