How He Broke My Heart

Chapter 6

I didn't see Milo for a few days after that night. Part of me believed that I had imagined the entire thing, that Milo wasn't real. It didn't bother me that much, but when I saw him on the beach messing around with a few people, I walked over from the seawall. There were four boys. Two had surfboards and were clearly enjoying the waves while Milo and another laid in the sand. They were all bare from the waist up, glowing in the sun. My cheeks filled with pinks and reds as I neared, and thankfully the two standing up motioned to me and Milo turned. He didn't give me much recognition and simply looked back to his friends, and I felt like a fool for a couple seconds. I took my loss and began to walk off, annoyed, but suddenly I heard him running up to me.

He grabbed my hand and kissed it as my other arm wrapped around my waist, holding myself. I told him that I thought he was going to act as if he didn't know me. Milo said, "How could I forget you? You're my Juliet."

He took me behind the t-shirt shop and kissed me against the brick wall, but I stopped when he reached for my shorts. I told him that he was crazy. He put his arm up, his hand beside my head, his muscles used as somewhat of a distraction. I wasn't giving in, I didn't really know what he was going to do anyway. We were in public, Sally could come through the back door anytime. But, he asked if I have ever had a boyfriend, really asking if I have ever done anything. I said I had a boyfriend, but we didn't do anything like that. I told Milo that he wasn't good to me, that he controlled me and attacked me. As expected and desired, Milo nurtured me.

We walked together down the beach, past the shops. We came up to the tee-shirt shop and the high chair in the front was empty. The mysterious girl was gone so I told Milo that I wanted to work there. We went inside, and with courage from his presence, I saw Sally—knowing she was the owner from my many purchases—and asked if there was a position open. She said that I had to be eighteen to work there. I told her how much I loved the shop, so she promised to save me a position. Two years seemed like forever, but I took it anyway and told my mother when I got home later that night. I was in an odd situation. I wanted to infuriate her and impress her at the same time.

I enter the familiar house with Kaden clouding my mind. How could he still be here? What if I run into him? What would I say? What would he say? I wonder if he'll remember me. I know that he'll remember me. There is no point in trying to convince myself that I am forgettable to him.

Lauren leads me inside like a seeing-eye dog. How can I focus on some party now? By not focusing on anything at all, I suppose. The atmosphere of a teenage party gives the opportunity to recklessly let go as if the world is ending and this is my last time to live. The motto of my generation seems to be: we're all going to die anyway so what's the point? I come from a generation of depressed, anxious nobodies with the potential to change the world.

Brandon brushes against me as we make our way through the people who crowd the foyer. I lean away, pushing against Lauren who nudges and shoves her way through. Her purple nails dig into my hands and she finally releases when we reach the kitchen. The counters are coated in empty cups and bottles, careless spills, and alcohol waiting to be drunken. A girl sits up on the counter with a half-full bottle of tequila, continuously refilling hers and her two friends shot glasses. The cool glass sits on her very exposed thighs, and she brightens when she sees us walk in. I know she isn't excited to see me, but Brandon, the one everyone likes.

"Hey! You came!" She shouts over the muffled music from the living room. Brandon waves and looks around the room before being engulfed by the girl from the bone fire. She comes out of nowhere and attempts to jump on his back. "Yay, Brandon," she cheers like a child. "I didn't think you were coming."

I expected Brandon to have an impressive array of girls falling in love with him, but everywhere I turn there is one smiling and waving and batting their lashes and plumping their lips by chewing on them. I turn to Lauren but she's waiting as her shot glass is filled by counter-girl, so I take a step back, hoping to ease my way out. Unfortunately, the flow of people behind me bump me right back in, catching Brandon's attention as I hit his back. "Sorry," I mumble, not remembering how these things work.