What If I Had

twenty two - something blue

Rick landed with a careless thud, sliding out of the space cruiser with one swift step and slamming the door shut behind him with the rest of the family inside. Everyone's belts were still buckled.

I had to lean forward, peering over Mrs Smith's head, to see Rick begrudgingly walk around the front of the ship.

His fists were balled up, stuffed into his coat pockets as he dragged his feet into the venue. Rick was annoyed, you could feel it sitting in the back. He'd been seething with vexation from the second I stepped out of the house. I felt my eyebrows furrow as I unbuckled my seatbelt, my eyes refusing to let Rick stray out of my sight.

Nearly tripping on the hem of my dress as I step out, I pat myself off and straight out the wrinkle on my hip. It isn't long before I take in my surroundings.

Planet Squanch really looked like a stereotypically alien planet. Like if you asked someone from the 50's what they thought an alien planet looked like. They'd say it had multiple moons, all the colour blue, in a bluish-yellowish green sky surrounded by red dirt. It honestly looks like this place is made of Play-Doh... kinda smells like it, too.

"Rick Sanchez! You psycho bag of squanch--!" Rick walked right through that crackhead looking cat. He sorta looked familiar to me, but I just couldn't put my finger on it. That thing looked stunned, like Rick's behaviour was just so unexpected. But I've gotten used to this part of Rick.

It flips like a switch for him, he's either on or he's off.

Summer's gasp followed by a long screeching squeal spooked me, making the hairs on the back of my neck stand. I snapped in her direction. She was running to embrace--

"TAMMYYY!"

Ughhhhhhhh....

"Oh, you made it!"

"I wouldn't miss it for the world."

Nice, another character I forgot about. Don't know how...

She's that dreadful bitch I met back in Chapter Three, so you know that was a long while ago.

I mean, for good reason I forgot she existed. I never liked her. You know she rubbed me the wrong way when I first met her, and she still gives me that bad vibe.

"Hi Gwen." Tammy said through an obviously forced smile, as if she had to behave on her wedding day.

I nodded solemnly before picking up the hem of my dress again, "Tam."

Nothing really mattered to me right now, other than what was going on with Rick.

Now, if I were a nihilistic alcoholic old man who was forced to come to this wedding where on Planet Squanch would I be?

Hmm...

Hmmm.....

....

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM....

Okay, yeah yeah I heard you. Which one of you called me a Dora the Explorer type bitch??

Shut the hell up. I'm going to the bar.

Morty, in his tiny little suit, was there already. Talking to Rick. Dress still in hand as my heels clicked with zeal, running towards them at the bar, I was too far away to hear any of what they were saying.