What If I Had

seventeen - did

My first time in the garage in a very long time is when I have to hide the evidence of a murder with my neighbours. Not how I imagined my Thursday after school. I would've thought I'd be in bed by now, enjoying a lengthy nap after consuming the big bag of dill pickle chips my Dad's been hiding from Mom in the pantry.

I'm the idiot lugging the heavy duffel bag full of bloodied wooden daggers, accidentally staining some of it on my top.

"Well, it was a tough adventure, but it paid off. Our school is vampire-free! Man, who would've suspected Coach Feratu?"

I snickered at his name as we walked through the garage door from inside the house, dropping the bag down carelessly on the cold cobble floor of the garage. If I had at least looked up to see where I had exactly plopped it, I wouldn't have gasped so sharply that I disoriented myself.

I felt my chest pang as I laid my eyes on the vat containing a lifeless Rick, floating around in some sort of liquid that couldn't possibly be water.

"Rick," I inhaled. "How exactly is your old body living in there?"

"Oh, you know, hyperbaric quantum fluid," Rick belched. "That kind of thing. It preserves living tissue. Not that there was much to preserve. Look at that mummy!" He laughed. "And I guess it's time for me to get back inside the old-timer."

Seeing Rick behave this way made me cringe. Like it was an imposter posing himself as the real Rick, the Rick that I know. I stared at him quizzically, suddenly snapping out of my trance at the sound of a notification going off.

"Oh, my God. Toby Matthews is asking if my parents are still out of town and if we can have a party!" Summer squealed.

Morty and Tiny Rick cheered for her.

"Ohh! He's asking if Tiny Rick will be here." Summer looked over at her brother in a surprised disbelief, then at her grandfather for reassurance.

"Well, you know what, Summer? Tell him Tiny Rick will be here! And tell him to bring some brews!"

"For real?!"

"Uhhh, not a good idea Summer. What Rick has done to himself is... unholy, to say the least."

"Y-y-y-you would stay as Tiny Rick, just so we can have a party?" Morty screeched, as if he didn't hear what I clearly just expressed.

"Hell, yeah! What's one more night? And who can have fun with this old bastard hanging around, huh?" Tiny Rick chuckles.
"Wubby lubby doob doob! Whoo! Tiny Rick!"

Oh God, oh God, that sounded so unnatural.

Although I had a really shitty feeling about this party, I still attended it. There were a ton of kids there that showed up that I could give less of a hoot about—

"Gwendolyn..?!" Jeeeeeeeesus.

I slumped forward in wary anticipation of the punch of death that was Jessica. I sucked in a deep breath of air and spun around on my heel, pulling off my best fake smile.

But that faded as soon as I saw who's arm she was clinging off of.

"Hi-hi Gwendolyn..." Morty smiled sheepishly, flicking a shy little wave at me. Jessica chimed in. "I just came by to say hi, I haven't seen you in an eternity."