Elixir

Chapter 20

           

8th November, 2017

BTS Dormitory, Taehyung's room,

9:45 pm, KST

After enjoying another scrumptious meal by the duo, Taehyung slumped in his bed, moving his hands around his stomach. He took shallow breathes and blinked dreamily through his popular gold-rimmed glasses. Helena sat beside him, flipping through his 'Learn fluent English in a month' book. He casted a constant stare, waiting for her to look up.

"This book is worse than I thought" she spat out suddenly, piercing her gaze through the frail pages.

Taehyung sat up straight and shrugged, "And why do you think so?"

"Because if you follow the way the book teaches, you might end up learning wrong pronunciations and grammatical mistakes. If you think this will help you in America then-"

"But I didn't start learning it for America"

"Then for what?"

He cleared his throat, took off his glasses and put them on her nose.

"I learnt it for us to converse well" he said slowly.

The spy pressed her smile and looked away. Taehyung shifted even more closer and put his arm around her like a pillow, letting her lay on his bed completely.

"I feel so warm when you come to my room with hot chocolate sometimes, I love it how fearless you have become considering this relationship."

"You convinced me. But, I'm still confused how we are gonna get away from all the risks we're taking. There's my job, there's other BTS members, there's army gossipers, and then there's this huge BigHit contract that you all signed for not dating anyone till you work. How are we supposed to be safe from all these?"

"Aww, you really worry a lot. Till you are here with me, I assure you that no one will have any problem. And you are going to stay with us throughout the tours, concerts, shows. And the day I will be disallowed to be with you, I'll quit."

Helena's eyes widened, what are you talking about?!

"You can't quit for me! Listen, Taehyung. I don't want to hurt you, I want you as much as you want me, but don't let me disturb your career. There's a long way ahead, you will shine with your talents- photography, acting, singing, dancing, and who knows, you might turn out to be a great rapper too! I'll be around, and even if I'm not, never stop your life. Don't mix me with your dreams, you will end up ruining everything."

Taehyung studied her for a moment. Her gaze lingered over his flawless skin, then glided away in to the cold air. He gently put his palm on her hand and turned her face towards him.

"Alright. I'll do as you say. But tell me one thing, what will happen of you then?"

"I'll be fine. I've always been fine, since the very first time I saw you, I was fine."

"Wh-when was it?"

Helena's eyes lowered. She just had to spill it all. There you go... she started telling him about her past. She told him about the time when she was a naïve fangirl with insane dreams who used to strongly believe in wishing upon an eyelash and meeting the one she dearly admired. She told him about how mad she was for him and how tremendous was the situation she was living in. She told him about how she cried every night hoping one day she'd see the boy she was hopelessly in love with, through her own eyes. She told him everything. Everything, except the confidential training she had at IPO. He was stunned.

"And all this time, that boy was me?"

She nodded, her head still resting on his arm. Taehyung turned his body towards hers and slid his fingers through her hair, untangling each copper-gold strand from the dark brown. She calmly let him do what he was doing.

"You know..." he spoke in a soft voice, "I've always wanted a girl who's strong inside and out, who dresses coolly and loves all the people around her. Someone who'll care for me enough to not let me go, and warn me when I do things the wrong way. I've seen many girls, be it classmates, colleagues or even other idols, but no one felt right. I haven't dated anyone till now, except for just going out once or twice with a girl just because I didn't want to hurt her" Helena looked at him at that line, "But yeah, no one was the one. And..." he kept on fiddling with her hair, "When our eyes met at the fansign event, I had that sudden feeling that I've found someone worth me. That was you. And now I think, we are destined to be together." Taehyung stopped talking and smiled.

Helena lifted herself from the bed and checked her hair in the mirror. They were perfectly knitted and swirled in tiny braids and her fringes were sided on Taehyung's glasses that she wore. She twirled around to try to see the braids behind, she was awestruck. Her hair looked beautiful bi-coloured crochet pattern. Taehyung got up and stood behind her, placing his hands on her shoulders. They both looked in the mirror with a lost gaze... a couple, a dreamy little couple.

"Look, we're so perfect together" he whispered in her ear, "let's be like this forever"

Helena turned around and put her arms around his neck, pulling him in for a long affectionate hug.

Taehyung's hands were tightly wrapped around her waist, and he rested his chin on her shoulder. Neither of them spoke a word. Time stood still, the spy closed her eyes and let herself lose in his tight grip. It was until Taehyung broke the hug and suddenly swept Helena off her feet, lifting her by her waist and putting her on the bed.

"Tae, what are you doing- "

He climbed on top of her and covered her lips with his. His body hurled closer to hers and his hands travelled over her back. She gasped, and her legs weakened, her heart pounded painfully in her chest. But it didn't stop Taehyung, his hands reached the parts of her body she'd never explored, his feet entangled with hers. Helena pulled off and simply stared in his eyes. They were dark and wild, the look she had never seen on his face before... dangerous and lustful, he looked at her the way a predator would aim for a prey. She was taken aback. I can't do this...

"What happened?" Taehyung asked in a prurient tone, "I thought we're together in this"

"We are, but I don't feel comfortable with this right now, I hope you understand." she replied with apologetic eyes.

Taehyung's mild look appeared again and he moved away from her. He adjusted his attire and ran his hands through his messed-up hair. Helena watched him, speechless.

"I'm sorry" he said after a while, "I didn't approve this from you. I guess I just lost my control."

"It's alright... I hope it won't scare me the next time I think of entering your room after dinner."

Taehyung glanced back, abashed. "No, I won't do anything till you are fine with it" he murmured. The spy planted a kiss on his pouty pink lips and bid him goodnight.

-click-

Taehyung peered at the ceiling alone in his room. It was clearly an insecure relationship he thought he had right now. It was no less than a hallucination. A hopeless mirage on an empty miserable desert called solitude. It pained him of what his uncontrollable affection towards her made him do. He looked different, acted different and seemed to grow possessive and overly protective around her. will this even work out? His mind was too reluctant to even think of not having her. Love is a game... he recalled Suga's words, it'll spin you till your heart rips into pieces. He didn't want that, absolutely not. I decide what I want to do in my personal life. He yanked out his notebook and scribbled some more lyrics. 'This one shall have a sad tune' he said and filled another few pages.

Helena filled up afew pages of her diary too. The tradition continued, this time, with differentfeelings.