When In Paris

Chapter 3

"Beautiful, is that you?"

I can still hear his voice ringing in my ears as silence fills the air and we stare at each other.

And for a spilt second, I forget all that happened between us. I'm about to walk up to him and hug him but then all the memories 5 years ago we shared together that I've tried so hard to forget resurface and flash before my eyes as I look into those beautiful blue eyes of his again after so long imagining them.

I frown and suddenly look down from his eyes.

His eyes were always something I liked about him - but now they are too painful to look at. They are like a mirror, mirroring all the happy memories we shared together 5 years ago before he left.

Yeah, I know what you're thinking 5 years doesn't seem like a lot with how little that has happened in my life since then. I mean all I've done is graduate high school and been studying at beauty school for almost 3 years compared to everyone who's already living it up big with their dream jobs but I mean I am about to graduate so I guess I will be it living it big too. 

Yeah right me living it up big. Who am I kidding,  I'm only setting myself up with false hope thinking I'll ever make it big. It still seems like a dream that I'm actually graduating with how these past years have been a blur with how much has been on my mind and due to that wasn't putting my absolute best in my study. So when you put it that way 5 years does seem like a lot when the person you start to develop feelings for just leaves without an explanation of where they are going or don't even say goodbye before they leave.

They just drop off the face of the earth and have no idea what damage they caused. They have no idea how many countless nights of these past 5 years you've cried yourself to sleep or can imagine how much pain you've been in since they've left and how god damn hard it is to move on and forget about all the happy moments and memories you've shared and created.

I always hoped for the fairy-tale ending I always dreamed of where he would come back and apologise for leaving me and we would confess our feelings for each other and live happily ever after in each other's arms.

But of course, unlike all the romance books and movies I've read and watched this isn't some make believe fairy-tale world where everything can be easily fixed. This is real life and as much as I would like to say I'm lucky with how good my life is compared to others; my life is far more complicated and harder than in the worlds of my romance books and movies.

My sister and I had a pretty good childhood despite all that happened with our father and the breakup. But whenever I had to escape the challenges of real life, I would pick up one of my romance books or watch a romance movie and escape into the make-believe fairy-tale world.

It was my little escape and still is sometimes whenever I've had one of my normal bad days.

They were always enjoyable to read and watch but unlike the average person who would just read or watch them just for fun – not that I didn't read or watch them for fun. I learnt two most important things from them, and they've really helped me from then to now.

The first thing I learnt that is different from the worlds in books and movies then in real life is that everything gets easily handed to the female protagonist whether it's a thing she wants, or a job or goal she's been working towards despite the obstacles that get thrown her way she doesn't have to work too hard to get what she wants by the end of the story or movie.

But in real life completely the opposite happens, and every woman especially has to work their butts off to earn respect and get what they want in this world. In a world where hard working women are looked down upon and are not respected or appreciated compared to men who get everything so easily without all the hate and criticism that women have to deal with.