underappreciated me (patrick stump fanfic)

When needed most

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Tuesday night, 21:06pm.

zara's p.o.v

its tuesday night and i've heard nothing from Patrick in those past few days, he wasn't in school yesterday or today. People were questioning me and questioning what was going on between us, i told them we were just friends.

just friends, thats all we'll ever be.

When i got picked up from my grandfathers sunday my mother began questioning my behaviour, she thought i was depressed. Im not depressed im just kinda pissed off. She blabbed on about her date with Joe until i told her i didn't want to hear it, Lastily before i slammed my bedroom door she mumbled something like, 'well he'll treat you better than your real father.' 

what kind of mother says those things?, she's cruel.

the past two days she's come in to check on me and make me my favourite dinners, she's tried offering me lifts to school but instead i've taken the bus. There's been countless of times where she has offered me to do some mother and daughter courses together because she feels our relationship is breaking down, i simply told her no and suggested she paid attention to Joe and Max.

but i think im starting to really hurt her feelings. I've become and moody, stubborn, annoying cow and i don't blame Patrick for not being here these past few days, im sure he's off with some girl. Spending all his time with her. But i can't help but get a gut wrenching feeling everytime that thoughts comes into my head.

"Honey, are you hungry?" my thoughts were interupted by my mothers voice, i turned around on my spinny chair to see her head slightly peeking in the door as if she's afraid i will attack, well if she is going to be like this and if i am losing everyone i might just attack.

"no." i replied bluntly turning back around in my chair. i know she won't take no for an answer and she'll continuously ask if i want anything.

"Okay," she replied and shut the door after her, thats strange, she never usually does that, she nags me for atleast 10 minutes then complains i never eat.

Maybe she's got the message.

"she's got the message alright," a voice behind me says, i turn in my chair to see Patrick at the window with his arms crossed and his face pissed off. why is he pissed off at me? i should be pissed off at him. "she's got it loud and clear Zara, your killing her."

i turned in my seat and pretended to ignore him and continue my math homework, if he's going to stand there he might aswell leave.

i don't need him.

"you can't ignore me forever you know that." he said getting closer to my chair. i turned around to see him sitting at the edge- end of my bed.

"i can," i replied,quite hostile," i can ignore you the way you've ignored me these past few days." i said tears threatening to fall down my face,i've always had a problem with people ignoring me, it always hurt me.

"i wasn't ignoring you," he said sitting even closer. "i was jus-- never mind what i was doing, just know that i wasn't ignorin you, i was busy." 

he was busy with Honey..i guess

"i don't believe you, in the slightest bit." i said through gritted teeth while looking down at my maths problem, right now i have my back turned to him, to let him know that im hurt and that he should leave before i make him.

he sighed and coughed.

wow great excuse.

"i was busy,ok?" he said standing up and walking towards me,i turned around and shot my eyes at him like daggers.

"what? are you going to hug me? do you think that'll make me feel better? huh? do ya?" i spat standing up the tears falling down now. "After my mom growing to hate me, Max never talks to me. I never see my father because of what i said to him. I only get to see my grandfather every Saturday and i have no friends!" i cried, " and for you to leave me when i most needed you." i said the last bit softly.

this time i looked at him and he looked like he was shot right in the heart, i do it all the time i push everyone away. Why? why can't i just be friendly? why can't i love anyone without hurting them? 

"i never meant to hurt you Zara," he said softly,quietly choking out the words between tiny tears,although they're not showing you can hear it in his voice.

of course you didn't, no ever does mean to hurt me, its always my fault

"No Patrick," i said placing a hand on his shoulder causing electricty to shoot through my arm," i never meant to hurt you, i never meant to hurt anyone." i choked," But i did."

he then wrapped his two hands around my waist and dragged me in for a hug. Although i didn't want to hug him,

i did.

"I'm Sorry," he whispered into my hair,"From now on, I'll always be here for you, I promise."

i smiled into his chest, "Thank you,"

i hope he keeps his promise.

**Hey guys, sorry for the short chapter, i was exhausted because i was away all night and didn't sleep but i did go swimming in the sea, yay. Anyways i hope you's enjoy this! nearly at 600 reads all ready! wow. i hope yous like this again haah

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Becks xx:)*

note: sorry for any grammar mistakes.