crybaby- Lil Peep fanfiction

chapter 20

skip a few weeks. gus is still hooked on xans, but is taking like 10 instead of 20. he is happy (ish) now, just addicted. idk why schemaposse broke up and tbh idc. i like the people in GBC way better. so i think im just gonna pretend that lil peep part one is under gbc? nobody correct me i know its wrong. 

bianca pov

one of gus's music friends hands me a red solo cup and i take a slow sip. they make him really happy, and that makes me happy. "ok you have to do it now," tracy says to gus. "you guys are so impatient holy shit," gus says. "kid just do it," i say. he pulls me onto his lap. "hush," he says into my neck. yunggoth laughs. "she's right, man. its taking you two million years," he says. "yeah, gus. im right," i tease. he rolls his eyes. "ok ok ok. if you guys want to quit BULLYING ME, i think im ready," gus says. i smile from ear to ear. he hits a few buttons on his computer. i take a gulp of my drink. my phone buzzes.

soundcloud: Lil Peep posted an album!

"did it go through?" goth asks. i nod. "did it really?" peep asks. he looks nervous, but excited. "yes," i nod. he pecks my lips. "must be nice," horsehead says. "truss me, it is," gus states while eyeing me. i laugh. "um ok wow gus," tracy says. "oh shut up, you're the one who had your tongue down cassie's throat the first day she came here," peep says sarcastically. everyone laughs. "you really finna side with them, goth?" tracy pleads. "i mean, shit. they not wrong," goth starts. tracy rolls his eyes playfully. "i hope your followers like that album," i whisper to gus. "its shitty," he shrugs. "it isnt. i think its fucking great," "youre just saying that," "no im not. you would know if i didnt like it." gus smiles softly. i take another sip of my drink. "you want some more, ma?" gus asks. i shake my head. "i gotta be sober for dance," i say. "im so excited to watch you," he smiles. "you finna be so bored until i perform," "it'll be ok," "you cant make me laugh while i dance. issa sad one," "how does a dance have emotions? that dont even make sense," he says. i laugh. "ok guys, gotta blast," i say as i get up. "already?" wicca frowns. "yeah. its a dance thing," i shrug. i turn to gus and kiss him smoothly. "see you later, ok? i love you," "ok. i love you too, babygirl," he grins. 

i get in the car and drive to my dance studio. i head to the locker room. macy, one of the best dancers here, walks in with a bag of makeup. "hey, um, rachel told me to bring this to you," she says discreetly. she isnt a bitch. at all. she just gets squeamish and uncomfortable when someone talks about my scars. i walk into the studio. i already knew my choreography, but she hadnt yet picked the song. "ok, so, i know it isnt a very popular song, but it has lots of meaning. it has some profanities, so if you hear giggles, its just the younger students. i wanted them to watch this one because it is very powerful," my instructor rachel says. because god forbid we say the word suicide in front of the girl with the scars. "ok, what is it?" i ask.

"its called 'Star Shopping' by a small artist called Lil Peep,"

oh my fucking god.

 i just nod. what the fuck. i think about the lyrics to the song and the steps to my dance. now that i think about it, the moves match the words really well. i hear the guitar strum and rachel shouts to start from the top. as i go through the movements, i hear rachel yell out "facial expressions! channel some kind of pain!". i remember that i haven't competed in two and a half years. i really gotta bring it. 

two hours later, after i have the counts, steps, and matching lyrics encoded into my brain, i am sent home to shower. i come back an hour later and prepare for the competition. 

(memory of when she first came back)

"BIANCA!" rachel exclaims. "hey!" i say. "how have you been doing?" she asks. "umm, pretty good," i lie. i have about 200000 scars. she gives me a look. "ok, not great. im doing good now thanks so my boyfriend gus," i say, wincing. "ok, good. we have to have you compete next month," she muses. "can we please cover my scars? my mom doesnt know how...fresh they are," i whisper. she nods.