Chapter 18

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"Breathe deep Miss McKellar, you need to try to calm down. We are going to do an ultrasound to see what's going on but you need to stay calm." The doctor said in a very calming voice.

Kay laid back onto the pillow and took deep breathes as the doctor squirted the light blue gel on her abdomen. She closed her eyes and tried to regulate her breathing while she felt the wand slowly gliding over the soft flesh of her stomach. The nagging stress in her head quieted when she heard the faint whooshing sounds and heard the doctor say that it was the baby's heart beating.

"Miss McKellar, if you look here on the screen, you will see your baby. He (or she) is moving around, and the heartbeat is nice and strong. I believe that the cramping is just your muscles having spasms from the impact of the seatbelt during the accident. I am going to keep you here for a couple days, and we will be monitoring the baby frequently. After you go home, I am going to put you on light duty for a couple weeks just to make sure that the baby is growing strong and properly." The doctor cleaned the ultrasound jell off of her belly and helped her adjust her bed so that she was in a sitting position.

"Thank you, Dr. Miles." Kay gave a weak smile.

"Excuse me, Miss McKellar; you have a few visitors out here. Do you want me to send them in?" The voice was coming from the pretty blonde nurse who had her head popped into the doorway.

Kay told the nurse that the visitors could come in, and she watched as they filed into the room. Seth walked in first, and Kay was very happy to see him since he hadn't been around in quite a while. Lillie walked in after Seth, and she was carrying Ava. James walked in next with a big bouquet of flowers, and right behind him was Jackson with his head hung low. Everyone gathered around her bed except Jackson. He stayed against the wall by the door in anticipation that Kay would tell him to leave.

"The baby is doing well. I got to see it and hear its heart beating rapidly. The doctor said it looks perfect." Kay smiled and looked towards Jackson. "Our baby is doing just fine Jackson." She said softly and watched tears fill his eyes.

"That's wonderful to hear." He whispered in response. "I'm going to go and let you visit with your friends and rest. You can call me when you're feeling up to it." He said with a weak smile before walking out the door with guilt all over his face.

"Poor Jackson, he has been beating himself up all night." Lillie said quietly.

"Yeah, poor Jackson; he crashes his truck out of stupidity and walks away while I am in here covered in bruises and cuts, not knowing if my baby will survive. Poor Jackson." Kay said with sarcasm dripping from her voice.

"Kay, he made a mistake. You cannot go on blaming him forever. He hit a deer; it happens. You need to ease up on him; he is already being hard enough on himself." James was starting to get angry with her. His brother wasn't perfect, and he made a mistake. Who the hell did she think she was that she could be so damn hard on him?

"Lillie, I'm taking Ava and we're going to find my brother. Call me when you're ready to leave." James took Ava from his wife and walked out the door, trying not to let his anger seep out.

Lillie and Seth stayed with Kay for a while and tried to keep her calm. Lillie tried getting Kay to understand that anyone could have hit a deer in the middle of the road, and that Jackson wasn't trying to hurt her. She reminded Kay that Jackson only wanted her and the baby to be safe. Lillie was trying her best to make her best friend see that Jackson loved her and would do anything to keep her safe and happy, but she didn't think her words were sinking in. Kay was a very stubborn woman, but Lillie knew that eventually she would ease up on Jackson.

After her visitors left, Kay sunk back into her bed. She knew that Lillie was telling her the truth about Jackson. She knew in her heart that he loved her, but he risked something big when he was driving angry and not paying attention. Kay had to give up her first baby; she didn't want to lose her second one. This baby was Kay's second chance at motherhood. It was her chance to prove that she had what it took to be a good mom. She didn't know if she could forgive Jackson for his stupidity that almost took that chance away from her. She knew she loved him, and she knew that eventually she would ease up on him, but she didn't know if she could do that just yet.

Jackson walked around the hospital aimlessly. He was so relieved that Kay wasn't badly injured and that the baby was going to be okay, but he was still filled with guilt. He shouldn't have been so angry with Kay for going out and having a good time. He loved her and wanted her safe, but it was him that took that safety away from her. He wasn't paying attention to what was going on around him when he was startled by the presence of his brother and niece. They stayed silent and walked around for about ten minutes before James broke the silence.

"Jackson, it could have happened to anyone. You can't blame yourself you know. You took your eyes off the road for a split second; do you know how many people do that every day? Every single driver out there takes their eyes off the road for a couple seconds at a time. You hit a deer, which is so common in this area. It's not even the first deer that you've hit. Remember when you were eighteen and you borrowed dad's truck to take me swimming and we plowed into that buck? I didn't see you beating yourself about that." James was holding his brother's arm as her tried to get him to listen to reason.

"You know James; I don't really even feel guilty for hitting the deer because I know that happens all the time. I feel guilty for the way I was treating her and for taking my eyes off the road to give her an evil stare. I have been so hell bent on keeping her safe and healthy that I compromised all of that with my anger." Jackson said sadly.

The brothers continued to walk in silence. They stopped at the gift shop so they could each grab a drink and Jackson looked around for the perfect gift to say 'I'm sorry'. They walked back towards Kay's wing of the hospital, still not talking. They were halfway there when Ava started screaming and crying. They stopped by a bathroom so that James could change her, and they decided to go back to the waiting room so that Avariella could have a bottle.

Halfway through feeding Ava her bottle, James reached the phone that was vibrating in his pocket. Just as he was trying to answer it, he saw Lillie walking up to him while ending her call. She sat down between James and Jackson with a sigh and grabbed Jackson's hand. She looked at him with a loving sisterly look in her eyes, as if she was carefully searching for the perfect words for the situation.

"Kay is stubborn and hardheaded. She can be bitchy and downright mean. It takes quite a bit to get her angry, but once you have it will take twice as long for her to calm down. I love her like the sister I never had, and I know that she will get over this and forgive you eventually. For right now, I think you need to go to her and sit by her side. Don't speak, just hold her hand. Listen to anything she might have to say to you, but do not get worked up." Lillie said to him with honesty and sincerity. 

Without exchanging any other words, Jackson walked down the hall and entered Kay's room. He set the yellow teddy bear down next to her and sat in the chair. It took him a minute to work up the courage but, after a minute, he took her hand. He did as Lillie said and sat quietly. He was surprised when a silent Kay squeezed his hand. He looked up at her to see a tear in her eye and a small smile across her beautiful lips.

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