Bad Memories // a.u.

chapter 31: the decision

It's been a couple days since my aunt showed up telling me she wanted me to go back to Rhode Island. In those days all I've done is sulk around my house and watch reruns of Friends.

"Noelle, this is pathetic," Skylar told me as she entered the living room. I sat on the couch with an ice cream carton in one hand and a spoon in the other, dressed in my pajamas.

"What is?" I asked.

"It's two in the afternoon and you're sitting here, eating ice cream in your pajamas!"

I sighed, placing the ice cream on the coffee table in front of me and muting the TV. "What am I supposed to do then?"

"I don't know, but not this," she shook her head. "I'm going to meet Drew. Are you gonna be alright here?"

"Yeah," I told her, not believing myself.

"Ok. Well, text me if you need anything." She grabbed her purse off the chair and I heard the door open and close a few moments later.

I picked the ice cream back up and turned the volume back up, settling back on the couch. As I swallowed the creamy chocolate goodness, I realized that Skylar was right. This was pathetic. I put the top back on the carton and carried it back to the freezer before walking up to my room.

I stared at the room and realized that my aunt was going to come back sooner or later so I might as well get ready for her. I plugged my phone into my iHome and blasted MKTO. I opened drawer after drawer of my dresser, pulling out my clothing before packing it into my suitcase. Tears formed in my eyes as I did this. I thought for sure that this day wouldn't come, at least not this soon. In a way I felt as though I was giving up, but I didn't know what else I could do either. Maybe giving up was the only option.

When I was finished packing my clothes, I turned to my desk and placed everything in the box that was still in the corner of my room from when we moved in. An hour later, my whole room was packed up and it looked eerily empty. A chill went up my spine and I couldn't look at it any more. I tuned off the music, yanking my phone from the speakers and rushed downstairs.

Friends was still playing on the TV as I hadn't bothered turning it off earlier. I fell back onto the couch and stared blankly at the show. My phone rang a couple minutes later, Keaton's picture showing up on the screen.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Elle. I just got off work. Want me to come over or maybe we could go do something fun?"

I sighed loudly, wondering if I should mention that I just packed up my room to leave.

"Elle? You alright?"

"Yeah. Let's go walk on the beach," I suggested.

"Ok. I'll be over in a bit," he replied before hanging up.

I zoned out, half paying attention to the TV show until I heard Keaton walk through the front door and into the living room. I stood up and straightened out the tank top I was now wearing.

"Ready?" he asked, coming up to me and wrapping his arms around my waist.

I breathed in his scent, wanting to commit it to memory. I wanted to remember the way his arms felt around me and the way his lips felt on mine. I tilted my head up toward his and kissed him, forcefully.

"Maybe we should stay here?" he suggested, kissing me back and running a hand up my shirt.

I separated from him and shook my head. "No, I want to walk on the beach," I whined.

"Fine, but we're continuing this later," he winked, grabbing onto my hand.

I laughed as we walked out onto my deck and down to the beach. I wished it was night, because I loved walking along the beach at night with the stars above me, but it was late afternoon and the sun was shining bright.

"Do you remember the first day we walked along the beach?"

"Of course," Keaton replied, swinging our hands back and forth. "It was the first time I saw you smile and I wanted so badly to kiss you, but I wasn't sure that you liked me."

I squeezed his hand. "I wasn't so sure at first, but you saw something in me. You helped me when I couldn't help myself. I'm finally moving on and I don't think I could've done it without you." I stopped walking and turned to face him.

"What is it, Elle? You're scaring me." He got that concerned look in his eyes, like he had that first night on the beach.

"I packed my things. I'm going to go back to Rhode Island."

Keaton looked into my eyes, his stare so intense that I finally had to look away. "You can't just decide this without me! It's not a one sided relationship, Noelle. We're in this together, aren't we?"

I sighed, letting go of his hand. "I just don't know what else to do, Keaton. I love you so much, but I'm scared. I thought I could do it. I thought I could stand up to my aunt and make it on my own, but I've been thinking about it and I'm only 17. I couldn't last a week on my own. I've never had a job and I don't know how to do anything for myself. It just wouldn't work, no matter how much I want it to." I was crying into my hands now and I wasn't sure how coherent my words were.

Keaton brought me to his chest, his arms strong around me. "Elle, I would do anything for you. I love you. Isn't that enough for you to stay?"

"I've made my decision. Whenever my aunt comes back, I'm leaving," I tell him. I pulled out of his grasp and look into his eyes one last time before leaving him on the beach and walking back to my house.

heyyy, so what do you think of noelle's decision to go back to rhode island? and what do you think skylar will say? please vote/comment xx zoe