Memories (Jadesy)

Chapter 8

I hadn't spoken to Jade in days, and I was fine with it. At least that's what I told myself. She hurt me. A lot. But I still missed her. It made me angry how she still owned a piece of my heart even after she lied to me, to everyone for so long, about something that was so important to me. Perrie and Leigh-Anne were still friends with her. In fact they had gotten closer again. Perrie told me that all of a sudden she remembered so many things at once again, that she almost knew everything again. Yeah right. I didn't tell them about the lies. Just that Jade and I had a fight and that I was still angry with her. But I did still meet up with Leigh-Anne and Perrie. They were still my best friends. In fact I was on my way to meet them at the mall. But when I got there, my face immediatly fell. Jade was there too. "What is she doing here" I growled, looking at Jade. "Listen Jesy, we don't know what is going on with you two but you were best friends before and it can't end just like that." Oh yes it can, she has already done enough" I sneered. "I already said I'm sorry!" Jade begged. "See? Were friends of you both so we had to find a way to get you guys to talk about it" Perrie calmly explained. "Fine. Let's talk then. In private" I hissed as I pulled Jade into a store and dragged her into a fitting room. "Talk" I demanded. "Please just let me explain myself" Jade said. "Well, go on then. Explain yourself. Why didn't you want to admit you liked me" I snorted sarcasticly. "Because... I'm afraid of coming out. No not afraid, I'm downright terrified of it." she said truthfully,looking me right in the eyes. "Why" I asked calmly. "I don't know I just think everything will be different, and I just want to hold on to who I am" she muttered. "It will, but that shouldn't matter. I came out to my mom, she couldn't care less, I came out to Perrie and Leigh, same story. It doesn't make you different get over yourself" I said harshly. "It's not that easy for me" She said. "Why not" I sneered. "Because my mother is homofobic Jesy" she proclaimed. "I don't know what she will do to me if I tell her I'm lesbian and I don't want to find out either because it's not going to be a good thing" she went on. "Is that reason enough for you" She asked me. "It's a reason you wouldn't come out, but it doesn't set right that you lied to me for so long JUST so I wouldn't bring up ONE event wich I wouldn't have because I thought I had an answer wich was for the record ALSO a lie!" I promptly said and walked out of the fitting room." And? How did it go" Leigh asked carefully. "How did you think it went? Listen I understand you want to help us make up and that's nice of you but she and I, it's never gonna happen. I'm done with her" I snapped. I went home as fast as possible. Just as I got home it started raining. She did it. She did it again! How did she manage to do it again? Every time she opens her mouth she strikes hurting me again. And still I feel something for her. I hated myself for it. It was storming outside. The rain was pouring, the thunder roaring with flashes of lightning. Just like the storm inside I thought. I took a pen and a piece of paper and started scribbling down.
I cross a desert and an ocean to get away from the pain of your storm.
And chase the sunlight. Been hiding from your shadow.
So that I could heal, and I didn't feel.
I did try to stay away from Jade so she wouldn't hurt me again. Tried. A lightning flashed in front of the window. The pen danced over the paper in my hand.
That zigzag shooting trough my heart
That zigzag hit me like a dart
Electricity, electricity
This love's tearing me apart
I've been running like the light from the dark
Electricity, keeps on hitting me.
Just like a lightning Jade would strike my heart over and over. As the storm roared on outside. I kept writing on.
Lightning strikes twice
And it burns like ice
I wish I didn't love you again
Lightning strikes twice
And it burns so nice
I wish I didn't love you
I was panting. I looked down at what I wrote. It was exactly how I felt. And I should've left it like that. But still, I couldn't help writing down three more words.
But I do...

Author's note
LIGHTNIIIIIING TRIIIKES TWIIIIICE, sorry I got carried away there for a moment. My apologies for making Jade's mum homofobic but it's just a book and I need a bit of drama. Yeah I know nothing much happened in this chapter but still. See you next tiiime!