broken | shyland ✓

chapter eleven

r y l a n d

a/n: song- chasing cars by snow patrol. listen to this whilst reading!

on sunday, two weeks later, it was pouring with rain, the sky a dark fog of clouds. weather like this was unusual for september. i woke up at ten am, refreshed despite spending the whole day with shane. we had headed into town and grabbed milkshakes, roaming around small shops before retreating home to rest.

the rain was quite soothing when you were in shane's room. the pretty colours, specifically the deep, midnight blue of the duvet, provided warmth and cosiness, despite the harrowing weather outside. we were curled up under a fluffy blanket, watching the latest episode of riverdale on his flat screen television as water smacked against the windows.

at some point, as my small body rested against shane's own, his hands had playfully found their way to my hair, brunette locks intertwined around his fingers. his touch was soothing, somewhat heavenly.

i'd been thinking about the way he had acted with me over the last few weeks, and came to the conclusion that him and garrett probably were not dating. sure, i'd overheard them discuss that they kissed, but what did i know? i suppose it wasn't really any of my business. sometimes, i felt like an outsider in the group. not often, only every now and then. i always feel welcome, but when they reminisce on times they've had before, it's difficult not to feel left out.

despite spending a lot of time with our usual group, after school on tuesday we had hung out with the boy shane met in math, dan, and his boyfriend, phil. they were both super nice, and we gamed around dan's house for a few hours before heading home.

but i digress back to the sharrett situation. today, i had told myself as i got ready to climb through the window and have a lazy day, i would ask about their kiss. casually, it would be brought up in conversation, i decided.

'shane?' i mumbled as his fingers delved further into my hair, eyes locked on the television screen.

he broke his gaze, looking down at me with a soft smile and bright eyes. 'yeah?' he replied, curling a strand of my hair before letting it bounce back into its normal position.

'i heard you talking about kissing garrett and i wondered if you guys were dating?' i rambled quickly, blushing deeply and clenching my fist in embarrassment.

shane grabbed my hand, briefly uncurling my fingers as if he'd done it a hundred times before, placing it back down on the covers. he chuckled, 'no, we're not dating. we just hooked up over christmas last year. nothing important, though. we're better off as friends.'

i took a few seconds to process the information. 'oh, right, so... isn't it awkward?' i asked, my body tending against his torso.

'relax, you're so tense.' he said quietly, and for a few seconds his fingers brushed my forearm. letting my shoulders fall, i sighed a little and he smiled softly down at me. shane grabbed the remote and paused the tv,
turning his full attention to me. his eyes were glittery and his eyelashes fluttered slightly as he considered what to say next.

'it's not awkward, it was just a thing. i mean, i don't look at him and think "oh hey garrett the person i had sex with", but i don't ignore it either.' he laughed and i grinned slightly, embarrassed. it made sense, that he'd lost his virginity; he was seventeen, good looking, popular and friendly.

'how many people do you think that with, then?' i smirked, intrigued that he was so comfortable with the subject as i raised an eyebrow.

shane burst out laughing, exclaiming oi! whilst gently pushing my shoulder. 'you've got bright red, ry, does the thought of two boys kissing make you blush?' he teased, and i grew even darker knowing that the thought of him kissing someone did, in fact, make me blush. i have no idea why, however. it wasn't like i fancied him.