broken | shyland ✓

chapter nineteen

r y l a n d

a/n: two months later!!

today had been a long and irritating day. i had no lessons with shane and my long awaited lunch had been spoiled by luke asking me pointless questions whilst walking beside me. i ignored him for a while, yet after several questions i snapped back answers, and he was on his way. the whole thing seemed suspicious, yet i shrugged it off; he was just trying to get into my head, and i knew that.

by final period, i was well and truly bored, wanting to escape my chemistry class room more than anything. i started sketching little love hearts on my notepad as we listened to the monotonous teacher drone on about acids and alkalis. the only person i knew in this class was phil, and since he'd moved up a set into ours we were now able to sit together.

'what colour will the solution be after two minutes... ryland?' mr halling asked as i rested my chin on the palm of my hand. i snapped out of my thoughts at the mention of my name, connecting eyes with phil who just shrugged. i hadn't even heard the question, let alone thought about the answer.

'seven?' i hazarded a guess, making the teacher roll his eyes and turn to the next person in which he wanted to torture.

phil shook his head in amusement at me, charcoal black hair pushed back into a quiff, different to the normal fringe he sported. 'what's on your mind, lover boy?' he asked, quirking one of his dark eyebrows upwards.

i couldn't hide my smile. 'just... life.' i grinned and tucked one of my hairs behind my ear. it had grown back so quickly.

phil snorted. 'yeah, life, sure. more like the auburn boy next door, hmm?' he was sketching tiny flowers up the margin of his ruled paper, black ink blotchy against the soft white lines. i replied with a nonchalant "maybe", making him nod with a smile.

i unscrewed the lid to my plastic water bottle, inspecting the palms of my hands, pinky-red scars only a ghost's whisper against my milky white skin.

phil suddenly turned to face me, resting his head in his hands. 'wait,' he whispered in a hushed tone, 'have you guys–'

i choked on my water, spluttering. 'no, phil, we most certainly have not done that.'

'really?' he asked, surprised, 'i'm surprised, shane isn't–'

'a virgin; yeah, i know. it just hasn't really come up, i guess. all we've done is kiss.' i replied honestly, returning to my note copying and listening to phil as he gave an extremely graphic description of this new video game he had, and as i listened to the tales of blood and gore, i pondered shane and i's intimacy.

i wasn't sure if i was ready to take things that far. it seemed a lot. we'd only been back together for two months, yet i loved him with all my heart so maybe that meant i was ready. i'm not sure. my thoughts were interrupted by the bell, signalling the end of the school day.

a large mixture of girls and boys were running through the halls. fridays were always everyone's favourite day. parties tonight, friends tomorrow, lie-ins the next day. once i reached my locker, i grabbed my bag and searched the corridors for shane or morgan. she had gym practice and the two of us had decided to watch her whilst doing our homework for the weekend.

half an hour later, morgan had waited around for a few minutes before excusing herself to go get changed into her kit and warm up. shane's phone was turned off and every time i hit the call button, i was gifted with his voicemail service. the lockers lacked any human activity, just me leant against the cool metal wondering whether or not he'd been held up in class, or got detention. deciding to ask drew, i brought out my phone and composed a quick text.