Perks Of Being A Fangirl (5SOS)

Chapter 34

Only a few more chapters left! I am thinking about a sequel but I'm never on here so maybe...sorry I haven't been updating I had a lot of work to do but it is summer so I'll update more!

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Ashton and I pull up into Elizabeth's driveway, Ash shaking his leg in a nervous wreck state. I have no idea what is wrong with him. So what I didn't come back at midnight?

"Lottie," Ash said, grabbing my hand in his and planting light kisses on my knuckles. "Lottie, Lottie, Lottie. My beautiful Lottie. I made a big mistake and I just want you to know I love you, so so much."

"What did you do?" I asked, my voice shaking a bit.

"Ashton!" Elizabeth screamed, walking out the front door.

"I'm so sorry, Lottie," Ash said, climbing out if the car door towards Elizabeth who had steam shooting out of her ears.

"You broke the rules! You broke more than one rule! Ashton, that can cost me my job and you your job!" Elizabeth stressed. I took this opportunity to climb out and join this discussion.

"What rules?" I asked.

"Lottie, please go inside," Ashton pleaded. Elizabeth lightly grabbed my wrist, pulling me to her side.

"You are not going anywhere. Since you broke the rules with him, you get to hear it," Elizabeth roared. "Except you didn't know their was rules to the outer participants in this program."

"Outer participants?" I asked, Ashton buried his face in his hands.

"I am an outer participant, Ashton and his band mates are outer participants, everyone who you interacted with besides the girls upstairs are outer participants! You and those girls are inner participants!" Elizabeth said.

"I am so confused, what are outer participants?" I have no idea what is going on.

"They are actors. You and the girls are victims. We try to make you break rules! This program makes us give you tests to see if you have learned to follow rules. Lottie, everything I am, or he is, or his band mates are, is fake." She explained. I felt my eyes water.

"So everything Ashton and I did was all fake?" I asked quietly, looking at Ashton.

"No!" Ashton yelled at the same time as Elizabeth, who said, "Yes!"

"He was set up to make you girls to break rules, but you weren't supposed to break them. This is the biggest one you broke," She said. "He broke a big rule too. Ashton, tell me. Did you have sex with Lottie?"

Ashton looked up at me, rubbing his chin. "You fucking idiot! I'm going to get fired!"

"I am sorry I fell in love! Lottie is the best thing that has ever happened to me," Ashton yelled, his voice cracking.

"So I was set up?" I yelled at him.

"Yes, but no, Lottie. At the beginning it was all an act. But I got to know you and I fell in love with you, I swear," He said, trying to grab my hand.

"Up until when?" I asked, already asking too many questions for my own good. Ashton looked at me with guilty eyes, not replying. I yelled, "Up until when!?"

"Ever since we all watched The Walking Dead together," He said. I covered my eyes and let out a sob.

"That wasn't too long ago," I cried. "I have loved you, not that stupid fucking fan girl love, but actually loved you since Calum's basement. Our first kiss was staged!"

My heart dropped into my stomach as I let out another sob. It was all fake. My friendship with my favorite band, was fake. My relationship with my favorite band's drummer, was fake. Everything in this fucking country besides my friendship with the girls, is all fake.

"You lied to me," I sobbed, grabbing fist fulls of my hair and pacing back and forth. "I thought...I thought..."

"Lottie, what's going on?" Amelia yelled, running towards me while looking at a guilty Ashton. "What did he do?"

"He lied to me. Luke lied to you. Calum lied to Juliette. Michael lied to us. They all did," I cried, pointing at Ashton.

"Lottie I didn't lie, I didn't lie," Ashton cried, tears falling out of his hazel eyes. "Baby, please you have to listen to me."

"Ashton, you broke the rule of 'no sexual contact with the inner participants.' You broke the rule of 'making an inner participant break a rule.' You broke the rule of 'preventing an inner participant follow a rule.' God knows how many more you broke," Elizabeth said.

"Elizabeth just listen to me!" Ashton yelled, pounding his fist on the hood of his car.

"What more can you say, Ashton? That you were acting about acting about pretending to love me? You said you loved me when you really didn't, that is enough to break any fan girl's heart. It's enough to break any girl's heart! You are a lier, you were apart of this sick joke the whole time, whether you 'fell in love' with me or not!" I yelled, tears free falling out of my eyes and down my cheeks.

"Both of us has done enough. Since you girls found out about the participants we can't continue the program anymore. You girls will be leaving by the end of this week," Elizabeth sighed, putting a hand on my shoulder.

"Lottie," Ashton said. I glanced at him once again and turned around. "Lottie, Lottie please."

I was about to go back into the God forsaken house with Amelia's arm around my shoulder when I turned around one last time at Ashton.

He was on his knees with his face in his palms. Ash looked up at me in the eyes, my heart tearing into millions of painful pieces.

"I love you," He said. I glared at him then looked down at my chest where my pink crown necklace he gave me for my birthday sat. I reached behind my neck, unlatched the hook and brought it in my hands.

"Keep it Lottie." Was all Ashton said. I took in in a fist and tossed it into the dirt in front of him. I may be over reacting, but knowing he lied about a big chunk of our time together wouldn't let me keep any reminders of him. Or any of the boys.

I close the door behind me, as I fall to the ground in pain. Not physical pain, nor mental. But emotional.

I explained everything to Amelia and Juliette when I went upstairs. We were all hurt, every single piece of our broken hearts.

But I guess this fucking place did teach us a couple lessons.

Lesson number one: Just because you are a fan doesn't mean they can't fake their love.

Lesson number two: There are no perks of being a fangirl. You always get hurt.