david + liza ; just friends

chapter 18; insane

Liza's POV;

I hear a knock on the door and start walking down the stairs.

I don't know who that could be but I take a quick glance into the mirror and fix my messy bun and brush off my 2 day old sweat pants.
I turn the door handle and swing the door open.
Him.
Why? Why did this have to happen to me? and now he's here.
My mouth drops open but I quickly pick it back up, I have trouble trying to choke out my words one by one.
"Wh..what are you, um doing here david?" I choke on my last word, scratching my eyebrow.
He's reply's after looking into my eyes,
"Can we talk?"
I mentally roll my eyes and respond,
"We are right now."
He brushes his foot along the ground and looks back up at me with the eyes that sucked me in before all this shit happened,
"Liza, can I come in and talk?"
Hope washes over me for an instance then my expression changes. Who the hell does he think he is? He thinks he came over to my house and ask to make amends? I've never felt so used. Hopeless.

"Um, sure." I say and push the door back slightly.

He takes his shoes off and waits for direction to sit down. I look around and address him,
"Uh, you can sit there." I say picking up the pillow off the floor and placing it nicely on the couch.
He sits down facing me, I scratch the back of my head waiting for one of us to speak up.
"What happened?" He says looking into the kitchen at the broken plates all over the floor, I have been meaning to pick up.

I look at him with lost eyes and a confused expression.
You.
I want to say. I shake the thought out of my head and begin to talk, now irritated.
"Can you just get to the point david?"
He runs his hand through his hair and slowly starts to talk,
"Okay, Liza. I need you to listen to me, "
i roll my eyes but he continues to talk.

"I never meant or ever wanted to hurt you. I was scared, I let you into a world of dreams and feelings I never thought anyone would see. I've never felt like that before. I'm so sorry. From the bottom of my heart, Liza. I am."

I take a deep breath and decide to call this bullshit or not. He starts to talk again.

"Everyday I thought about you and what you were doing, even though I didn't want to I did. I though about how you were feeling, how I made you feel. I would focus in on the details I remembered about you. That uplifting laugh I used to hear, the smile that could light up the world. Your deep sea eyes. The way you walk when your happy- with a skip in your step. How you play with your hair when your nervous. When your in class and you know the answer but your afraid to say something. That you only like Starbucks becasue that's the trend and you like Dunkin donuts better. That your favourite music is music with a message. How much you miss your mom and dad in the past two weeks. Why you never go anywhere without chapstick. That you thought you weren't capable of love. How you've let me into your heart too."

A tear drops down my cheek.
I finally choke up something to say and it's not good.

"David, uh I need you to leave." I say.
"Huh? Why?" He says quickly. I stand up and lead him to the door.
"Because you can't see me like this." I mumble and shut the door.

Then the bucket overflows. I feel like I'm going insane.
I scream and fall to the ground crying, not being able to control my breathing.
I continue screaming and feel a pain in my head and chest.
I feel like I can't move. and then someone opens the door, I really hope it's a mass killer so I don't have to feel this anymore. With the sunlight pouring in I can't see who it is,
then they come to vision.
It's david. Again? Didn't I tell him to leave?
"Liza! Liza, can you hear me?" He says in panic.
"It's gonna be alright, don't worry." He says again.
A sharp pain runs through my head and I scream out in pain. I hear david on the phone,

"Yes, ambulance please."