His Medicine

3. Black and Blank

Anxiety started to take control over my mind as i saw him entering the room, but more than that he wasn't alone this time. A lady with a few files on her hand also came following his suit.
That definitely didn't give me a good vibe. I watched as the lady took a seat next to my bed on a chair and Jimin was standing tall on the legside of the bed.
I could feel he was hesitating to say something as he was fidgeting his fingers. What was the thing he always did when he was nervous or hesiatate.
But eventually spoke, i could tell that this was not going to be pleasant.
" Y/N.. "
The voice was soft almost like a whisper, he didn't look at me in the eyes as they were fixed to the ground.
" She has come here to met and ask you some questions. " as he finished he shot his head at my direction.
But my inside was jumping, fear, anxiety, nervousness taking control over my body. What should i do now.. i can't reveal in to anyone. No one would believe me as i didn't have any proof regarding my condition, because of which i would might end up in front of him again.

" I would really appreciate if you answer my questions correctly " as she said, i nodded my head looking at her.
She smile and started digging into some papers before grabbing a pen from her bag and started writing something.

" So... "
As she was done, she looked up to me.

" What exactly happened that night when you bumped into Dr. Park's car ? " her tone was professional.

Before opening my mouth, i stole a quick glance at the man looking at my direction as if he was eager.
I shallowed and started hoping they would buy what i was going to say.

" A-actually, i was returning home and some man were chasing me. S-suddenly they attacked and fortunately i ran from them "
As i finished i gulped a hard rock.

I was never good at telling lies but that time i had to. But i could feel guilt inside making look down at my lap.
I lifted my gaze and the next moment met him, his brows were joined together making me sure that he didn't buy what i made up at all.

" Okay, did you know them like they had any personal grudges? "
But the matter of relief that, her tone sounded like she believed what i said.

" No, i-i don't know them, they were just drunk.. " i tried to sound strong.

" ok.. Do you want to involve the Police in that case Ms. Y/N ? "

Hearing the name of the Police somehow made me uncomfortable, since what that i said was mere lie.

" N-no i don't want to. " i wanted to sound confident but i could feel my heart beating so fast that i could even hear it.

" Okay.. thank you Ms. Y/N for co-operating with us, we actually know your condition but there are certain rules for the safety and for the image of the Hospital. So we had to get the answers " as she said i could feel a sudden change of her tone showing her concern.
I just nodded.

" And... and one last question ? " as she said she seemed a bit unsure, the previous professional tone kind of wavered.
I frowned my brows.

" Were you sexually harassed ? "
As the words left her mouth, i shot my eyes on her direction as she was looking at me with soften eyes.
Suddenly i could feel a shiver running down my spine, making me feel cold, naked as i looked down. As if i was stripped down in front of a big crowd.
All the memories rushing through my mind, when i had to do things what i only wanted to share with the person i loved. All those times i was forced, i was forced to lay down. But there's nothing i could do, he always got what he wanted. He only showed how he owned me, i never felt any kind of love that he declared. It made me feel disguisted, filthy. It made me feel so small, so ashamed. Whenever he wasn't around, i kept on showering trying to wash out his scents, his touches. But that became useless as the new one replaced the older.
But at least, it was between me and him. Now that, they could easily understand what happened to me made me feel naked, more filthy.
Specially when, he was there. I could his intense gaze glued to me. The fact that he would know how wasted and filthy i was, made it feel even worse. Was he going to look at me with disguist? Like i was a trash? Or was he going pity me more? More than he was already feeling maybe?
I could feel my nerves jumping, suddenly i could feel my head being light and everything started being blurry, unfocused. At that time, i couldn't feel my body but could feel how my body gave it on me and the soft mattress touched it.
Then..
Black and blank..
Please let me die this time..
I couldn't take it anymore...