C o l d

~25~

Draft: 30/03/18  21:13
Published: 2/04/18 11:32

»»————-　　————-««

'I love you. Even if you hate me, I will always love you,'
.
.
.
.
.

I have always secretly admired you.

I have always secretly loved you, relied on you and needed you.

Your smile, your hands, your laugh, your eyes.

Not those contacts. Your actual eye colour. The colour drives me mad. It's so beautiful, so pretty and jaw dropping. They're the most delicate colour I've ever seen,  if it makes sense. I don't know why your parents, Jina and the classmates call them weird, disgusting and demonic.

If anything they're beautiful, amazing and angelic.

They're so pretty, so majestic. They hypnotise me to stare into them for an eternity. I just...want to see them for all my days. Until I die.

But now I can't.

Jina's a bitch. I hate her. She separated me from you. She made me hurt you. She made me backstab you and now you hate me.

I...I feel like I'm going to be sick.

I feel lost without your touch, your gaze, your laugh. Everything's black. Everything's fading into a gruesome black. I hate black. I hate it so much.

You were my candle in the dark, guiding me through a thick, dark forest. You were my moon in the ocean, shaking me the way through the story seas. You were my sun in the sky, heating my skin and showing me how beautiful the world is. But now, without you, I can't see. All my thoughts are consuming me. All my mistakes are screaming in my head. All my actions are swirling in my mind, creating a whirlpool of darkness that I can't get out of.

I text you every day, every night, but you never respond. It's agonising for me to see that sparkle in your eyes go away. It's almost painful to see you're not smiling, not laughing, not talking at all after what I've done.

I made you like that.

I killed you.

I stripped your trust to me away.

I killed our friendship.

I ruined everything.

So I'll be the one to end everything.