Cruel Love (Gotham/Oswald CobblepotFanFic)

Cobblepot's Forbidden Love: 38. I'll Be Damned

"So ...my father is in town. It's strange, he was never there for me growing up. He has a idea to take over Central City -kinda- it feels like something you would have planned. It's weird. The man I hardly ever known is in town and I am thinking about going with him, but I am engaged. Oz is a great guy, he ...I think I really do love him, it has been hell without you and your guidence. You say I gave you advice, well you gave me a life of laughter, love, and adventure. You were my father."

"You were everything nobody in this world -" I took a deep breath and wiped my eyes with hte back of my hand that held the flowers "-nobody in this world cared for me like you did. Even when I didn't know ...you were there for me. I love you, I wish I could have saved you" I told the grave and wrung the stem of the red roses in my hands "Sal, I don't know what to do anymore. I'm tired of being a killer, I'm tired of spying on people ..But it has always been my life. I need you now more than ever."

I laid down the roses onto his grave and buried my head into my gloved hands.

Somehow ...I had made my way to his grave. I don't know why I decided to come here, all I know is I needed my uncle, I needed him more than anyone ...even Oz. I wiped my tears from my eyes "I love you. I wish I could sit down and talk with you ...but that can't happen, bye Uncle Sal."

I walked down the walk from the cemetery and went out onto the streets. I moved hair back from my face as the wind whipped. My father had dinner with me last night and told me about a plan to take Central City over, Oswald doesn't know yet and I don't plan to tell him.

I'm not going to do it.

Or, at least that is what I tell myself.

I walked all the way to Cobblepot Manor my mind in the clouds thinking, Oswald stood on the porch looking at me as I walked up to him, he wrapped a arm around me.

"Are you alright?"

I smiled up at him "Just fine, I am going to meet Harvey at a bar in awhile. Expect me home late" I told him, he tightened around me and looked down at me worried. "What do I have to do to convince you I am okay?"

He chuckled "I could think of some things to show me my Nessita is alright ..go have a drink with Bullock" he said with a sigh "I love you."

I ran my hand across his cheek making him close his eyes "I know."

"-that old bastard needs to get out of town" Harvey said about my dad as someone threw a chair at another costomer. We were off to a corner booth "He can't expect you to o with him after everything that ...I mean, he leftnyou and Linda."

I sighed and leaned back in my booth "Im engaged" I said for the first time out loud to somthing other than my uncles grave, Harv's eyes widened "Oswald proposed. I said yes."

"Please tell me you are joking" he said, when I didnt reply he took a deep breath "I would hate to know what Maroni would be saying right about now."

"Oh. He would have a hissy fit" I answered as I sipped my beer, I looked at the label "This is the first time since ...I havent drinked since that night" Harv cocked his head to the side.

"There is nothing wrong with a drink every once in awhile."

I bit my lip as I looked at the time "I gotta go. Its one in the morning and Oz is probably worrying."

"Be safe, if Damian worries you come to me and I will-" I kissed his cheek making him smile.

"Night Harvey."

He nodded as I waked away from him "Goodnight. Give your pet penguin a kiss for me" he shouted over the bar fight that started making me laugh.

I walked down the sidewalk and decided to cut through a alley, I saw a ladder hanging down from the roof and climbed it.

Dark at night, I used tonlobe jumping buildings at night in Gotham, I looked out over Gotham and yawned. I covered my mouth quick with a sigh. I love Gotham ...I love Oswald ...but being a assassain is part of me.

Its who I am, its who I was raised to be.

Even as I thought it I knew my answer. I wasnt ready to be a wife, I wasnt ready to be what Oswald needs... I wasnt what he needed. He needs someone to hold after a long day if being the King of Gotham.

He doesnt need me.

Thats when I felt a needle go into my neck and my eyes rolled back into my head.