Author's Note: This chapter has a different feeling to it than most, but this final part is the most intense in terms of drama. However I think it's going to be important in developing the characters further down the road, so bear with me.
Episode 2: The X Impulse
Installment 3 of 3
Kitty laid in her new - and still never slept-in - bed, one of the two pillows hugged against her chest while the other continued to get wet with her tears. She finally calmed down after the encounter in the infirmary, but fear was still alive in her heart. Not of the strange boy anymore, but of the perspective that being a 'mutant' herself is a one way road towards becoming as abnormal as he is.
She can walk through walls, there's no way it makes her be like him. All she ever tried was to fit in, and something happened that made her different, but not like this. She can't let herself be put in the same category as someone who could never fit in... She can still fit in, somehow. Ignore her power and go back home. She can. She should.
She needs to have her old life back.
She cleaned her nose and dropped to the floor beside her bed. She pulled out one of the bags she emptied just half an hour ago. She unzipped it and opened just as someone knocked on the door of her room again.
This time she wasn't feeling quite confident as she responded; "...Come in..."
Jean slipped inside. "You're unpacking?"
Kitty looked down at the empty bag in her lap. She nodded, but then figured there's no point lying. "I-- Actually I was going to, like... pack back."
"Pack back?" Jean asked sitting down on the floor beside her. "Are you that scared of staying?"
Pryde tightened her grip on the straps of the bag.
"Don't worry, Kitty. I know how you feel" Grey said softly. "When I first came here I wanted to go back home too. In fact, by the end of first week I was out the door with my stuff. I was scared of what this place is offering, requiring... what it makes me."
The words hit so close to home that Kitty's palms relaxed. "Why didn't you leave then?"
"Scott stopped me. He talked to me. He convinced me we all feel the same way. Scared, alone... I know you feel that way too. And staying here is difficult because it's like you admit to not belonging in the outside world... Like you commit to being a freak..."
Kitty felt tears in her eyes.
"...But it's not how it is at all" Jean assured low as she reached to her back. Kitty looked at her, her eyes almost begging to be told why. Why this painful truth isn't accurate. "We're here to turn our differences into strengths. We work together to create something special... We understand what it's like to feel like you don't belong because of being a mutant, and that's precisely what the Professor is trying to prove wrong. We'll show other people that we do belong in the outside world. But to do that, we need to learn how to use what made us feel like we don't."
Kitty was quiet, it made sense but it felt like the hard way. Why not just ignore what makes her different. Why not pretend it doesn't exist. No one would know, all she needs to do is never, ever use it.
"Tell you what" Jean put her hand on top of her own, causing her to ease the grip she still had on the empty bag. "Stay for a week or two. No one will force you to stay, but you may find that life isn't always about being the same as everyone else. Sometimes it's what makes us different that makes us belong."
"...Fine" she whispered. "I'll... I'll stay. Just to, like, give it a shot."
"That's all I ask."
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X-Men: Revolution
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