Our Love Is Tainted

Chapter 21: Searching For The Light

I watch Tate as he violently breaks his fist through the walls of the house, each wall making Chad cringe and sigh. But he doesn't say anything to Tate, nobody wants to, everyone is too skittish to try to speak the walking time-bomb that is my boyfriend, even I'm slightly scared to speak to him. He appears to be looking for something, but I don't know what; maybe Nora, Taint, maybe something else entirely. I slowly make my way towards him, making my steps loud enough so he knows I'm coming, I don't wish to startle him when he's completely stressed.
"Tate?" I say softly, getting his attention. "What are you doing?"
"I- I have to- I have to find her, fuck knows what he has planned for her," Tate shrieks, sounding more stressed than before. "I need to find clues, I need to think about where he could have taken her, I need to fucking know where she is!"
"I know," I say, placing my hand on his shoulder, feeling him shake violently. "We'll find her, I promise."

I watch him as he hits the floor, punching it violently, creating a massive dint. Each punch makes Tate's hand bleed more and more, which sends shivers down my spine, I hate blood, I have since I stopped slitting my wrists, makes me feel sick.
"We're going to find her, Tate," my mother says. "He's probably just hiding her away from us, using her as leverage."
"No, no, no! Vivien, you don't understand! None of you do!" Tate snaps, making me nearly jump out of my skin. "He antagonised me, told me he was going to rape Violet, 'make her bleed', and he seemed to be fucking serious to me! That's why I went crazy before and beat his face in, why I didn't want to stop beating on his face. I swear, if he touches one hair on Nora's head, I WILL FUCKING RIP HIS HEAD OFF WITH MY BARE HANDS!"
I'm clueless, I don't know what to say, better yet, how to make her calm down. His time-bomb is about to go off, and with the amount of stress ticking around his head, it's going to be a hell of an explosion. I can hear his breathing change to something else, something that I've never heard before; like an angry beast mixed with a monstrous demon, the mere sound of it makes me more scared than I already am. It's obvious now, he's afraid, afraid that Taint is going to rape his mother like he did to my own, the thought makes me hurt from inside. I know that won't happen, Tate would do things to Taint, that would make the devil weep if he did, or, he would let himself die again and again.

I watch Patrick and my dad as they move to comfort him, but they got shut-off when he stands up, pacing around again. Tate looks like a wolf pup looking for its mother, panicking while howling and crying out to her. The sight swells up my eyes, sending tears down my cheeks and slowly down to my chin, hitting the floor in a quick second. Hateful tears roll down his face like he's in some panic-attack like-trance, but he's in complete control; he knows what he's doing and why he's doing it.
"Tate?" I cry out to him. "What are we going to do?"
"I have to- I have to think, we were the same person, right?" Tate says. "That means if he knows a hiding place, so do I, right? I need to think about places I hid through those months or places I woke up after blacking out. Yeah, that's right, that's I have to do!"
Tate moves to a different wall, punching his fist straight through it, and gripping onto something, something inside the wall. Tate yanks, breaking the wall from inside with a large object; an axe.
"I haven't used this axe since the girl that tried to kill you," Tate explains. "But, in a time like this, I intend to use it again. I intend to cut him down, make sure to remove his head and bury it somewhere away from his body. I apologise to all of you, but I have to do this, and there will be blood."

I make myself appear in front of him as he begins to move away, stopping him in his tracks. I place my finger along the blade of the axe, creating a small cut on the soft flesh.
"Vi, what are you doing?" Tate gasps, dragging the blade away from me. "You hurt yourself!"
"Yes, because I'm a part of this now! The axe just took my blood, it owes me now, I'm a part of it, I'm a part of you!" I scream. "All I can tell you, Tate, is now, I'm going to be a part of this, and I'm going to help you find Nora, whether you like it or not."
"What happens if we find him?" Tate snarls. "What will we do."
"I'm going to help you cut off his fucking head!"