The Devils Son

Chapter 1: Fires shadow of pain

I was sitting at the dinner table slouched over my plate of cold food, it's been a long time since my parents actually sat down and ate dinner with me and each night I always sit and wait for them but they never show.

Mum is always busy sorting through paperwork for the company her and Dad work for and Dad's always on the computer doing whatever it is he does. I don't even know what it is my Dad does I don't think anyone knows, but whatever it is he spends every waking moment doing it. Constantly typing up stuff, I don't think I've ever even seen him leave the house.

So, with my Mum and Dad always in the study room with piles upon piles of paper work it leaves me all alone, to eat the cold food that I don't even feel like heating up. Since the age of 10 I've had to learn how to fend for myself. Everything that I can do I've taught myself and although I've grown up relying on no one and having to do everything myself it's not something I've gotten used to. It's not something I want to get use to. I miss the way it used to be before they started working for this company, before they got that stupid phone call from god knows who.

Each night I wish they would just give me a little bit of their time but they never do. Sometimes it feels like they don't even want me here. I don't even feel like I'm apart of this family anymore, I feel like I'm closer to the moon then what I am my own family.

I've even come to the conclusion that I might be adopted, I've been tempted to ask them if I am but each and every time I go to ask I stop myself not really knowing how I'll react if they say yes, and sometimes I actually want them to say yes, because that would make sense as to why they don't talk to me but even then, I can't help but feel this emptiness in my stomach when I think that I might actually be adopted.

Every time that I think of the possibility that I might be adopted I break down crying, I've stayed awake for days with no sleep just thinking about the possibility that I might be adopted and it makes me feel so numb inside. Why would my parents put me up for adoption, was I not good enough, am I just not wanted by anyone?

I looked at my food one last time poking it with my fork. The tears in my eyes threatening to fall and all I wanted in this moment was to just collapse onto my bed and fall into a deep sleep. There have been many times where I'll go to bed with no dinner because it goes cold before I actually decide to eat it, and tonight was one of those nights.

I sat up from the dining table and headed over to the kitchen scraping all the cold food into the bin before leaving the plate in the sink for me to wash later seen as though my parents are always too busy to do the dishes so I'm always left doing the dishes along with all the other chores in the house.

I headed upstairs to have a shower before going to bed, I grabbed my pyjamas and slippers from my cold, empty room and headed towards the bathroom, probably one of the loneliest places in this house, the bathroom is where I do all my thinking and the majority of my crying when I've had an upsetting day.

The bathroom is the furthest room away from my parents' so it's basically impossible for them to hear me. When I got into the bathroom, I relieved myself of the tight itchy clothing I was wearing and grabbed the shampoo and conditioner which I had bought earlier that day because I had run out.

I turned on the shower letting it run for a little while so it could warm up before stepping into it. I was in the shower for a little while thinking about why my parents wouldn't want me and why they don't spend time with me, tears started to form in my eyes and I dropped to my knees.

"Why won't my parents spend time with me" I cried out, the tears dripping slowly down my face. It took a while for the strength in my legs to return for me to be able to stand and get ready for bed. I stepped out of the shower and grabbed my pyjamas from the cold floor so I could get dressed, I brushed my teeth and whilst doing so I looked at my empty reflection in the mirror, tears still slipping down my face ever so slowly.