Speak

Chapter 7

   "If I cannot understand my friend's silence, I will never get to understand his words." ~ Enoch Powell

Thursday is a complete blur. I would like to say that the text message on Wednesday didn't bother me, but the bandages I had to place upon my wrists tell a different story.

I had to force myself not to go too deep, knowing if I did, despite the sweet bitter release it would provide, would most likely send me back to Shadow Mountain. I have to prove to Gumby that I'm strong enough to make it on my own, that I don't need constant supervision.

I tried to respond to his text messages as casual as possible. He can't know. He would make me drop out and move back home faster than he could draw his sidearm.

Other than the annoying texts from Gumby, I vaguely remember Thursday. One of the things I looked forward to the most coming to college was escaping everything in the past. Of course, the past always seems to catch up with you. You can run, but you can't hide forever.

Today, Friday is a new day. I would be lying if I said I was looking forward to it. First I have to make it through classes, which includes psychology with Malibu Barbie. But it's not just Malibu Barbie. It's the TA that is quite likely Wes's ex-girlfriend.

The ex-girlfriend that cheated on him, with Ethan.

I try to make myself look at least halfway presentable. I pull my hair back into a loose ponytail, hating my hair to be in my face. I am careful to select bracelets that I know will hide the evidence of my most recent relapse, not wanting questions from anyone, especially Trip.

Trip.

"So, my favorite author decided to stop writing the series they were working on," Trip begins with an overaccentuated depressed expression on his face. "Everyone was harassing the author about not publishing fast enough, so he just posted that he was giving up writing." 

I don't know what I would do if one of my authors abruptly decided to stop writing, especially if it was in the middle of a series and left the story hanging. I would probably be frustrated as well.

"Puh-lease!" Trip growls with a scowl. "Talk about ruining my mojo!"

I can't help myself. Did Trip just mock Austin Powers? The way he is being overdramatic and overly animated in his frustration is just too much. I try to roll my eyes but I am just too amused at his dramatics.

"Oh well," Trip continues, hanging his head low. "All things must come to an end."

Trip's dramatic display continues as he throws his hands in the air. This boy would make a horrible actor. It is probably better that he has decided to go into Education. Acting is definitely not cut out for him. 

"I guess I will just have to stick with kinky fuckery stories like Fifty Shades of Grey." 

Please... just stop. What guy in their right mind would ever dream of reading Fifty Shades? I won't even touch that book. He is just too much and I burst into laughter. Immediately, Trip's expression turns into a sly smile. 

" I'm glad I could make you smile," Trip says. I have to admit, he definitely was a bright point in my otherwise shitty day.

" So, you want to tell me what that foul mood was about?" Trip asks seriously. 

My smile quickly dissipates. Could he tell? I thought I had become very effective in hiding my emotions. Does he actually pay more attention to me than I give him credit for? I quickly look down, ashamed that I had let Wednesday's events get the better of me. If Trip knew, who else knew? I need to be more vigilant with my feelings.