Be my Quest

Not So Different At All

Lucan's POV

I have been waiting for what feels like thirty millenniums for Astheum and I am starting to give up. My heart feels empty, hallow, shallow, dead. Delphic no longer speaks to me, he prefers to just stay quiet and silent. We no longer speak to one another, but in order to keep one another's sanity we engage in a simple little conversation here and there. My family worries and fears that I am destroying myself because of the intense isolation I place myself in. The thing is I can not help the situation or place I am in, it was inevitable. The pity that many people give me is sickening- no useless, it does nothing to help me nor Delphic. My family has kept Duchan around so I do not commit suicide or anything else along the lines of self extinction. Duchan is the keeper of smacking some sense into me.

The crazy thing is it feels as if Astheum has never gone. In a sense she haunts me. I hear her, feel her, and sense her but I can never touch her nor see her, this is the part that kills me the most. Delphic feels as if it is our fault she is gone and killing myself is completely pointless because I'm immortal. I can never die. I watch those around me grow old while I am stuck at the same age and look that I was in when she left. Having to wake up in the morning only to realize that the monster I see in the reflection is not the Angel King but it is I, myself. The beast that was incapable of protecting himself let alone my own mate. How saddening. How disgusting. My dear Astheum she never got to live long enough. Long enough to see how the times have changed and people have become less civil.

New ideas like Facebook, Twitter, and Tumbler are causing normal civilization to dwindle. Social interaction is no longer as important because at a click of a button your moment can remembered, a message/emoji can be sent and one can move on to the next. There is no longer any sense of a healthy balance between technology and socialization. Many choose one over the other. Although Astheum, if you were here I would capture every moment with you, live in the moment with you, I would never allow you to eat at a table while I am on my phone. The moments could be taken on both my camera and my eyes. The images and videos will be recording in both film, photos and my mind. Depression and sadness overcomes my soul, my heart and my mind. Love, Where are you? When are you coming home, coming home to me.

"Now my lord what are you thinking about today? Are you going to school today?"
Duchan says as he waltzes into my room.
I look at the clock and then back at Duchan saying, "Nothing. I am thinking about nothing. I won't go to school today, but I'll go to practice."

Duchan laughs at my answer and says, "So you would go to football practice but just not school?"
I shrug and say, "I've already learned these topics and subjects thousands and thousands of times already! I've aced everything because it's easy. I am not going to school. I am and have been 23 forever. You make me go to hugs hook as entertainment. I am sick of it. I will not go. Period."

Duchan shrugs his shoulders in defeat, "You're not going to find her by doing this you know? Why don't you just give up? She is never coming back. You have a kingdom to run, a family to begin, you are not getting any younger. Find a different girl? There are so many girls that would die just to be with you? I have never even seen this girl?! You've been waiting over twenty millenniums for this girl! She's not coming back!"

Delphic took over my body in a flash and I did not stop to fight him. I was too weak and hurt to resist anything.  "Don't you dare speak about my mate like that ever again! Or I will not hesitate to demolish your soul! I will eat it slowly and watch you suffer. You may be my personal butler and best friend, but I will not tolerate my mate being called that or anything else for that matter."

Duchan smiled at me and I personally thought he was insane. "There's the friend I was looking for. Thought you disappeared somewhere there before."

Delphic slowly eases into the back of my mind and I slowly allows me to come back into my own body. "Duchan! Seriously you could of died there! Don't test Delphic nor I like that! I wouldn't want to lose a good friend like you!"

Duchan just smiled again saying, "I wouldn't want to lose you either my lord."

"I'll go to school tomorrow I promise, but just not today I've had enough of high school. Especially that one."

"As you wish my Lord."And with that Duchan left and darkness surrounds my room. Not a speck or glimpse of light penetrates my room. Only darkness. I did not long for any light, brightness, or color. It reminds me of my beautiful Astheum. Call me whatever you would like a baby, over emotional, a girl or etc, but I could care less. The darkness replicates my soul at this cetain time period in my life. When someone you love and is your everything is taken away from you, you will know how I feel. Am I right? My heart and my soul are no longer complete and it surprises me how I still manage to keep my sanity still! I made a promise to Dunchan I would go to school tomorrow. Oh how I dread it, but how different could it be this time? Huh? Not so different at all... I hope....

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Hey Loves!

Poor Lucan! I just wanna cry for the guy! He makes my heart wanna cry out for him! Duchan is such a cutie isn't he? He'd risk his life in order to save his Lord's sanity.

Like always DEAREST!

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