The Beautiful Broken

#3

#3

Dr Asfandyar walked into the hospital building towards his chamber. The nurses at the Nursing station closest to him were surprised to see him this early and there was a flurry of activity as everyone started straightening up from their early morning stupor. He stopped to check with the reception and the supervisor there gave him a white envelope. " Dr Zubiya ne aapke liye diya hai.

Ripped it open with a thudding heart, it was a leave application for 3 days. He breathed a sigh of relief, so she hadn't run off yet. He intended to have the conversation before she did something even more stupid than this. He assumed she was trying to stay clear and consolidate on what she had already done. Well there was still time.

He saw Rustom and asked the resident doctor how Khajista and was told she was stable with no great change yet.

Several times during the day, he found himself wandering out to the Doctors common room, or seeking out her friends like Dr Haroon and Gaiti Bhabhi, just to make sure no body knew anything out of the ordinary. He did not want to seek her out yet; wanted to give her space. He knew wherever she was she wasn't doing well.

After a few hours, he sent someone over to the Hostel to find out where she was and was told she hadn't returned home since the last night. He bit his lip trying to think where she was. Could she have gone to her khala? Where did she live? Could she have gone somewhere else?

As the day wound to a close, on his evening round, he was constantly reminded of her. He realised he had forgotten how to live without her gentle quiet presence, assisting him every evening. All at once he felt forlorn and angry,

how stupid are you, Zubi that you placed no value on my love. What made you lie to me? Why was it so difficult to tell me the truth? Didn't I deserve to know the truth.

As he went past the ICU, he decided to pop in and check the gun shot patient, who was actually Dr Shehroze's patient. As he quietly walked in to the darkened room, he saw Dr Zubiya sitting in a chair at the side of her bed holding Khajista's hand in her own hands, sitting silently without a movement, watching Kahjista's closed eyes.

He stopped mid-stride and some instinct told him not to go up to the bed. He had a sense he was watching something very personal, a very private moment that he wasn't meant to and he withdrew to the shadows of the heavy curtains near the door. She hadn't heard him come in; he had the feeling she wouldn't have heard him even if he had come charging up the room. Zubiya was completely absorbed in the figure in front of her eyes, lost in some private ...hell? He tried to read her expressions and couldn't. He felt as if she was communicating with the unconscious Khajista, with a tender yet fierce absorption.

Dr Asfi was stunned. What was happening? Why was Zubi so lost in this young village girl? Had she been here since the last night? It looked like that. Her hair was loosely spread over her back as though it had escaped confinement some hours back. Her normally covered head was bare and she was oblivious to everything.

The regular beep of the heart monitor and the O2 stat machine showed some change, becoming faster and irregular. Zubiya looked up at the monitor, and started to panic. She leaned over Khasjita , grabbing her hand speaking to her fiercely in a an urgent, low but clear voice. He could hear every word from where he still stood, unable to move either towards her or away.

Z: Khajista, Khajista, meri baat suno. Mat jao please . meri awaz sun rahi ho na? is baar main tumhe bacha loongi. Is baar main tumhe marne nahi doongi.

Khajista stirred slightly, and then more . Asfi watching broke into a sweat. He glanced quickly at the monitors and decided there were still a few more minutes before they needed to intervene. The nurse came but, he just put his arm out and waved them away.

Z : with more urgency: Khajista, aankhen kholo. Please mujhe suno, mujhe thaam lo main tumhe wapis laaoongi . Ammi. Is baar main aapko jaane nahi doongi. Is baar mein unhe aapko maarne nahi doongi.

Zubiya's voice low but insistent, determined, willing Khajista to live. She didn't realise when she started speaking to her mother. Sweat and tears running down her cheeks, her forehead strained with the effort to help Khajista cling on to life, Zubiya was in the recurring nightmare of her life, trying to resurrect her mother back to life.

From deep somewhere, Khajista opened her eyes weakly and in halting tones "Zubi baji aapki Ammi bhi

Z: still speaking in the trance like manner-- "Haan Khajista meri Ammi bhi. Meri Ammi ko mere Abbi ne maar dala. Isliye tumhe aaj jeena hai. Mere liye, apne liye , meri Ammi ke liye Her eyelashes fluttering weakly Kahjista sank back into her unconscious state.

Dr Asfandyar, was pushed aside by Dr Shehroze as he hurried inside, alerted by the staff. Immediately Dr Shehroze and the nursing staff surrounded the patient. Zubiya stepped back, and stood watching impassively. She turned back and walked out, Almost as an after thought she registered the presence of Dr Asfandyar, his horror struck face, his clenched hands. She saw him with unseeing eyes and walked past. He came to his senses and rushed to the bed.