kryptOnite

kryptonite • 50

a letter for an ex-girlfriend

she's like you.
i wonder how on earth there could be a serendipity like this.
she has a pair of big brown almond eyes like yours.
raven wavy hair like yours.
pink thin lips like yours.
she loves MLTR, too.
i can sing paint my love with her.
she plays guitar, too.
she teaches me lessons you haven't.
she cooks garlic butter prawn, too.
and 4-minute over easy egg.
and avocado toast.
she hates spring onion, too.
and pineapple on pizza.
and szechuan chili sauce.
she smiles when i call her beautiful.
she annoys me when i get too busy gaming.
she wakes me up with a kiss on my forehead.
she sends me random text,
leaves random note,
and tags me on random post.
she and i dance in the midnight,
go grocery shopping and trolley racing in the aisle,
watch horror movie with lamps and volume off.
i do things we used to do, with her.
she's like you. i'm almost able to see you in her.

but she's not you.
her eyes don't twinkle spectacle like yours did.
the silver moon doesn't play with her hair like it did with yours.
she doesn't bite her lower lip while smiling, like you did.
she sings, but my heart doesn't harmonize with her.
it tells me that she's not my refrain.
she plays guitar, but her melodies don't brew romance.
they just come and go where the wind blows.
she hates things you hate,
she loves things you love,
she does things you do,
but...
holy fuck. i don't really care.
i try to find you in every smile she smiles.
it's the taste of your kisses that i wish i could find behind her lipstick stains.
it's the smell of your shampoo that i wish i could find whenever i hug her in the shower.
it's your body. your voice. you.

she's like you
but she's not you
and i'm not him

she doesn't make me happy like you did
and i didn't make you happy like he does

but when i look into your eyes while holding her hand, saying "happy wedding!" to you and him,
can't you see that i want you back?

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