Exploring the Wasteland.

Present Day

Day 35

I woke up after sleeping for just 5 hours; I hardly slept anymore. I rolled out of bed and checked on Hope, she was still asleep, but she needed to be fed and changed. So I picked her up and carried her into the back lounge. I lay her down on her changing mat and tickled her tummy lightly. She opened her eyes and smiled at me; she then took hold of my St. Christopher and began to play with it. She loved my necklace; if I was holding her she'd never let it go. I giggled softly and then took off her little baby grow before changing her old nappy for a clean one quickly cleaning her and giving her a little dusting of talcum powder. She sneezed gently. 

"Oh I'm sorry baby did I use too much powder?" I cooed and tickled her feet. I then picked her up again and sat her on my lap to feed her. Even though I wasn't her mother, my body had begun producing milk which allowed me to feed her. Mother Nature saves the day. I enjoyed these peaceful moments during the mornings where I could pretend that I was just a normal mother and she was my little girl, and the outside world wasn't real. I guess we all have our escapes. After around an hour I heard shuffling from the bunk area and I guessed one of the guys was awake. When I saw Aaron's dishevelled head appear I smiled. 

"Morning dude" I smiled at him.

"Morning Shiv" He smiled back. He took a seat across from me, next to where I'd laid baby Hope. He looked at her half asleep. I thought about his night terrors and I had a sudden urge to hug him half to death. There was no way that he could carry that burden on his own. 

"Who is Alyssa?" I looked at him, I knew that this wasn't going to be an easy conversation but I knew that it was one we had to have. He looked like he'd just been stabbed, he went pale and then stumbled over his words. 

"How, how do you, know?" He mumbled.

"Your night terrors Aaron, every night without fail, you toss and turn, you have some invisible struggle before crying her name, and then passing out" He stared at me and then swallowed.
"Alyssa was my little sister, way before all this, we were walking home from the movies one night, I'd taken her to see Twilight-" He half smiled at the memory 

"We didn't live in a good area, we got mugged, and she tried to stand up for herself, I tried to stop her but, she wouldn't listen" he choked slightly, before swallowing and then carrying on "She told them to fuck off, calling them useless low lives, I tried to get between them, but they knocked me out... When I woke up in hospital, my little sister was dead" He looked at the ground, his eyes full of every emotion, silent anger, grief, and regret. 

"They raped her, and then they stabbed her, she bled out, the doctors couldn't do a thing, they said there was too much damage" A tear rolled down his cheek. "She was 14, she was just a child, and they threw her away like she was nothing. I will relive that night for the rest of my life, I should be dead, not her" He stopped speaking altogether, he sagged, the tears coming freely now, streaming down his face silently. I moved towards him, putting my arm around him, holding him while he cried. 

"It wasn't your fault, those bastards. They have a place reserved for them in the darkest pits of hell, they're probably dead right now, eaten alive by some walker" He cracked a grim smile. "That would be too good for them"

"She'd want you to go on, you've got to live your life for the both of you now" I smiled at him.
"No one I knew in this life has ever asked me, I've passed through a few places before I came to this group and slept at least one night, but no one asked. Only you did, thank you Siobhan-Rae" He pulled me in and hugged me tightly.
"It's alright sweetheart, we're a family now, and it's what we do" I gave him a warm smile.
"Now, I'm starving, wake the others up, it's powdered eggs and jerky for breakfast" I grinned.
"My favourite" He chuckled back.

I walked into the area we called a kitchen leaving Aaron with Hope. I heard more shuffling and Colby wondered into the kitchen in his baggy shorts.
"Morning gorgeous" He smirked and wrapped his arms around my middle.

"Morning trouble" I smiled.
"How about powdered eggs, jerky and Lucozade tablets sound for breakfast?" I laughed.

Colby rubbed his belly "Ooh delicious" he laughed as he walked back to wake the boys up.