Various Vocaloid One-Shots

Don't Bite My Baby

Type: Vocaloid x Vegetable
Main Characters: Miku, Kaito, Leek
Author's Note: This is just for fun. I actually want to do a lot of these and I'll be doing them every now and then. It's stupid. I just wrote whatever.
~~~~~

Miku was walking around the park, spinning her trusty leek around and around like a baton. She hummed her song, 'Melt', as she looked around and admired the greenery.

"Isn't it beautiful?" She sighed dreamily. Everything was green and gorgeous. She skipped along the stone path and continued to hum in harmony with with the chirping of the birds.

As she went along the path, she spotted a daub of dark blue among the greens. Se gasped and ran up to it.

"Kaito!" She made sure to project her voice so that the blue haired boy could hear her. He was sitting on a bench, reading a book about the history of ice cream while eating an ice cream.

As soon as Kaito heard the teal haired girl's melodious voice, his heart began to pound furiously against his ribs. He nearly dropped his book. As Miku ran towards him, a stupid grin forming on his face as she came closer.

"Miku!" He exclaimed, feeling bubblier than soda. The girl plopped down on the bench beside him and sighed loudly.

"It's nice to see you," she said. Kaito nodded.

"N-Nice to see you, too," he stammered. He looked at his shaking hands and offered the girl his ice cream, "Do you want a taste?"

"Is it vanilla?"

Kaito nodded. Miku took the ice cream come from the boy's hands and licked it from one side. He watched the girl, admiring how cute she was. He was too shy to tell her that. He wanted to, but he just couldn't.

"It's good!" Miku grinned almost as childishly as him.

Kaito laughed softly. It looked sort of romantic, how he had ice cream and she had a leek, and that he had offered her some of his snack. So, without a word, he leaned forward and bit some of the leek.

Miku gaped at him, horrified. He chewed and pulled back, frowning quizzically before swallowing.

"Is something wrong?" He asked. Miku seethed and gritted her teeth. You could practically see the steam billowing from her ears.

"You horrid, wretched, vile, filthy, disgusting animal!" She shrieked, repeatedly smashing the leek's shaft against the boy's head. He cried out because it actually hurt and she just wouldn't stop.

"M-Miku, I'm sorry, I just...," he tried to say something but the girl let out a guttural roar before he could. She socked him in the face, knocking him out. He fell to the floor and she stomped on his hands and kicked his ice cream cone across the pavement.

"Damn you!" She screamed, "Damn you, Kaito, you insipid, appalling, stinking, degenerate troglodyte!"

She kicked his unconscious and limp body for a good five minutes or so till she was satisfied, and then she turned her attention to the bitten leek in her hands.

"My baby," she whispered, tears in her eyes, "Sweetheart...are you okay?"

THE END (or something)

ALTERNATE ENDING FOLLOWS:

She kicked his unconscious and limp body for a good five minutes or so. Then she shoved the leek down her throat, unlocking her mecha powers. Her arms clicked and whirred, becoming cannons. Her legs transformed into rockets and a visor slipped over her face.

"Those who deface the divine leek must be destroyed," she said robotically before blasting off and disappearing into the blue sky.

I think I like the alternate ending more.
PROPS IF YOU KNOW WHAT A TROGLODYTE IS