sorry | lee minho

red

i stared at the clock on my wall, contemplating whether or not it was worth it to get up and get ready for school. the hands of the clock striked six am and the alarm of my phone sounded. i sighed as i disconnected the charging cable and switched off the alarm.

i stood up from the comfort of my bed. my hair covering my eyes and touching my exposed shoulders. i shivered as the morning was chiller than usual. i switched on the lights and went to my closet to pick out my clothes for the day.

"a sweater and jeans i guess. im pretty sure i dont have to make an elaborate impression of myself on the first day of school." i sighed to myself as i put on my sweater. it was the start of a new school life for me. even though it was smacked right in the middle of fall.

i grabbed my half empty backpack and headed to the kitchen. i was greeted with an empty atmosphere ; nothing out the ordinary. the sounds of my mom crying in her room and my dad rushing for work.

"good morning darling. im running late again so prepare your own lunch alright? have fun on your first day of school here," my dad kissed my forehead ever so gently while rushing to get his shoes.

i looked into our pathetic-looking fridge. empty. what did i expect.

"hey dad, is it okay if i bought lunch out today for both mom and i?" i looked at my dad with a pain in my heart.

he was clearly overworking himself. going off to work super early and returning home only after ive slept. i rarely see him anymore. he just nodded and gave me some money. soon after he left the house, i was greeted with silence again.

i headed to my mom's room to bid her goodbye for the day. i opened her bedroom door only to see her lying on the bed, drowning herself in tears.

"mom, im leaving," she looked up and for a second she smiled.

"moonbin ah ? youre back ? where have you been ? why are you leaving again ?" she walked over to me.

"mom.. moonbin is gone. stop it please im your daughter, moonbyul. mom please" my heart ached as my mom went back to her bed only to continue sulking.

i closed her bedroom door and looked at the picture of moonbin and i that my parents had hung up outside their bedroom.

"you idiot.. why did you have to leave us like that.. look at mom, look at dad, look at your younger sister. are you happy now that youre up there?" i silently cried as i left the house.

ever since my brother committed suicide, my mom suffered from the sudden shock and was no longer the same. dad has to overwork himself in order to support the family ever since mom shut herself out from the world.

the colours that used to fill up this household was now a dull, empty gray.