Harry says his farewells to my parents and then goes to his truck to wait for me. I hug my parents goodbye, but I find that paying attention in this moment is proving to be extremely difficult. Harry literally kissed me outside my bedroom no less than five minutes ago, and then ran off to sit by himself without saying really anything about it. I'm both confused and angry. Confused, because I really just don't understand what the hell has just happened or what the hell he was thinking by walking away. I'm angry because he kissed me in such a way that kind of makes me think he wants to be with me, but then he takes it back nine seconds later. Who does that?
My mother notices my distracted state of mind and asks me if I'm alright. I nod, telling her that I am just fine, and then make to leave. However, I don't think I'm fine if I'm being honest. Harry is giving me such mixed signals, and I just wish he would tell me how he feels because I'm getting to the point where I just can't take the uncertainty anymore.
I know I've literally only known him for two weeks, but knowing Harry isn't like knowing other people. Knowing him is wonderful and intense; it's like every second with him is more vivid and more colorful than the rest without him. I just, I don't know, I just feel so much more alive when Harry is around me. During our short acquaintance, or whatever it is, I feel like he has seen parts of me that no one else has, and that is what makes these two weeks so significant. Though I would normally despise the idea of someone knowing my secrets and fears, I find myself not minding if Harry is the one who gets to know them. It's crazy and stupid, I know, but knowing him has been one of the greatest feelings I have come to experience, and I would not change anything about it.
I finally reach his truck and climb inside, completely clueless as to what I want to say to him. I know that there needs to be a conversation, but I have no idea how to begin it.
He starts the engine and it roars to life, initiating the beginning of our journey together. I only hope that I will be able to say that figuratively as well as literally. We drive off, neither of us saying a word. The only sounds that fill the still air between us are the steady rumble of the engine and the soft sound of Nat King Cole's smooth voice playing through the speakers. I find this odd because when we went dancing that one night, Harry told me that he hadn't ever listened to Nat King Cole, so I can't help but wonder if he has been listening to this music simply because he knows I love it.
Nope, that's stupid, brain. Anyone can listen to Nat King Cole and not have ulterior motives.
I shake off the thought and try to focus on what I am going to say to him. Do I just ask him what he's thinking, or do I tell him that he can't play with me like the other girls? I genuinely have no idea what the best course of action is, and I can't stand not knowing how this conversation is going to play out.
Before I can stop myself, and without any plan, I find myself blurting out whatever is on my mind, "Harry, I know you might be okay with not talking about it, but I'm not. Why did you do that?"
Okay, that came out much ruder than I intended it to. He probably thinks I'm mad, now.
Harry's jaw tightens momentarily as he stares silently ahead at the road, and I really hope that my bluntness has not offended him. He bites down on the inside of his cheek and furrows his brows to give him a very serious and intimidating demeanor. Oh shit, I think I made him mad.
I expect Harry to say something nice like he normally does, but I am disappointed to see that his guarded, player side has come to make a visit.
"What do you mean?" he asks, keeping his attention fixed in front of him. Bruh, really?
"Are you kidding?" I say flatly, raising my brow at him in disbelief. I knew he could be frustrating, but this is simply ridiculous.
Harry huffs in frustration and glances angrily over at me for the first time since getting into the car, "No, I'm not kidding. What is it that you want to hear? Why do you think I did it?"
YOU ARE READING
Silk || hs
FanfictionThis is a story of what you wish would happen when you go to college. So buckle up and settle in, because Harry Styles is gonna make us all feel alive again. Highest ranking: 59 in #harrystyles 176 in Fanfiction