A Demon's Angel

~23~

⚠️🎧🎧⬆️

music creds to yt: Smyang Piano

reminder : writing on the right is from the past/flashback/memory

~6 Years After Separation~

The dull brown building inside the fence showed up in color, children playing in the yard that was full of green, lively grass, the rusty wooden bench that had been sitting there for longer than the building had even been there was also present. Everyone was gathering around for a game while the teachers were preparing lunch, except for one 5 year old girl.

"Hey," Amber sat next to the little girl, on the same spot where 5 year old Amber once sat. "What are you doing out here by yourself?"

"Jidae said she was going to live a family tomorrow. Is that true?" The young child's eyes expressed a sorrow so powerful, the lights in her eyes dimmed. "Is it because she doesn't want to be my best friend anymore?" The deep question made Amber's heart break. She shook her head and gathered the small child in her arms, gently resting her chin on top of the little girl's head.

"Yes, Jidae is going to live with a family. They have a pet bird, and a son that is younger than her, but you want to know something? I'm sure that Jidae is never going to forget you when she grows up. You're always going to be the light in her life from here, and one day, you'll light up a family's life just the way you did for hers."

"Mrs. Jung?" the child interrupted the silence of the moment.

"Yes, sweetheart?" Amber leaned back, brushing the orphan's bangs away from her face.

"The kids are saying you're going away..." Amber's eyes widened in shock. She wondered if the whole orphanage knew about her leaving.

"Honey, I'm sick and I don't want you kids to get sick too."

"How did you become sick?"

"Some bad people made me sick when I was little."

Saying she was 'sick' was one way to put it.

The more accurate way of describing it was more like there was no way of avoiding her death.

"When will you come back?"

"I don't know."

"Are you coming back after your belly is gone?"

She laughed at the way the child expressed her way of calling her pregnant, "Yes, sweetie." The child laughed innocently along with her, unsure of why Mrs. Jung was laughing.

"I hope you come back soon," she expressed, then ran along to go play tag with her friends.

In the ultrasound room, her tears burst forth like water from a dam, spilling down her face. She could feel the muscles of her chin tremble like a small child and she looked towards the window, as if the light could soothe her. She heard her own sounds, like a distressed child, raw from the inside.

We expect to bury our parents one day, but never our children.

The worst part was that Amber never even got to bury her parents.

Her friend, who was one of the nurses, was talking to her for all the good it did. "I'm so sorry, Amber. No one deserves this." It took something out of her she didn't know she even had left to give. It's like a theft of the spirit, an injury no other person can see.

All the children crowded at the fence which separated them from the one woman they all loved and would miss dearly, who was now leaving. "Bye, Mrs. Jung!! Come back soon!"

Even when this rain stopped, when the clouds went away, she stood there, just the same. Without saying anything, looking at the world. There, a not so beautiful her was looking at herself. The young, lonely five year old who had been through so much in this world: her parents had died and left her alone, her hope had died, leaving her alone in the dark, and now because of her condition, she would lose the one part of Hoseok she had left.

Hopefully, the day would come when she would lose herself as well, letting her be at peace in a place where things would be better. Where she wouldn't be alone.

Hopefully, she would find Hoseok up in heaven, waiting for her.

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:)

7/29/18