Devil In Her Heart

I Want To Tell You

Chapter 15; 

*Eloise's POV*

I sat on the soft bed, waiting for John to get off the phone with Brian and Paul. After the fight they had, Paul called apologizing, John didn't want to accept it... But after we talked about it he decided too. And I know it'll take awhile for them to get back to the way they were again, but they're best friends and a best friend is hard to find. 

"Hey," John says, setting the phone down and coming towards me. "Why don't we go for a walk on the beach, yeah? I've got some things I want to talk to you about love." 

"Alri' let me get my jacket." I said, standing up as John handed me my leather jacket. I put my hand in his once I get it on and smile. "Lets go then."

"Look, Eloise. There's something I want to tell you." John started off, breathing in and out his cigarette after we'd been walking awhile. I was happy to be there with him.

"Go 'ed." I told him as the tide came up, hitting my bare feet.

"Well, after you woke up... You didn't really ask about yer past ye know? I think ye thought you've got it all figured out, but there's some stuff ye've got to know." John said, sounding urgent. I didn't even want to think, I just listened. "Once, you went to America... we lost contact, we both had tried to write. But the bloody mail and all. So, you were working in the same Hotel I was stayin' and we met back up. B-but you left, and you only contacted Paul and George."

"Why?" I asked, there had to be some conscious reason why I left John and why I wouldn't speak to him. I tried as hard as I could to think of the reason, but my head pounded with the new information and me trying to think back to memories that I didn't have.

"We-I was drunk. Th-the bloody bird kissed me. I promised I didn't do it, but you left. Without me even letting myself explain. I thought you died, Eloise. That's what they told me, they told me you were dead. And I fucking mourned forever. So you came back to London, and look at you. How much you've changed, I barely recognized you, but I felt something that I thought I could only feel around you. You lied and said your name was Michelle." John said the last part quietly, as his hand had a tight grip on my own, I could here his voice breaking.

"Why did I do that? H-how did you find out it was me." I asked as unnoticed tears fell on my cheeks.

"You weren't datin' m-me. You were with Ringo... And after they took you to the hospital, and identified... I found out."

"So you lied to me." I asked softly, my hand going limp in his, I couldn't yell at him I felt as if I'd shatter if I did. I could feel goose bumps rise all over my bare skin. "H-how long were you going to keep this from me? We're you just gonna string me along and pretend that you loved me? Pretend that this... this lie was how my life was, that everything was back to normal?"

"Y-you don't think I love you?! Eloise, what bloody else could cause me to do something like this? I never wanted to hurt you, I thought of all the things I could've done to stop that girl. But I couldn't go back in time and that's the worst damn thing. I loved you like mad and I still do! When I met you, God, I thought I had finally found someone who made me feel the way you did. But it's just you Eloise. It's always been you."  John said pulling me into his arms, and kissing me softly on the lips. "It's always been you."