Burden (tododeku)

Chapter six

I continue to run home even though I can't see anything through my tears.

After a few minutes of running and crying, I trip over what must have been a rock.
I let out a yelp as I fall to the ground.

My head hits the ground with a slight bang and before I can do anything, everything goes black.

***

I wake up on Shoto's bed and internally groan.

I try to sit up but I feel a shooting pain go throughout my head.
I reach up and feel gauss and wrap going around my head.

I sit up anyway, ignoring the pain and look around.
I don't notice anything different so I get up and go outside his room, ignoring how dizzy I am.

I still have no idea how I got here or why my head hurts so much so I go and try to find Shoto.

I find him sitting on the couch on his phone.
I go over to him and sit down next to him, "why am I here?" I ask quietly, looking up at him and waiting for an answer.

"You ran off earlier and somehow fell and hit your head. It's nothing serious, you'll just have a headache for a while.." he replies, still looking at his phone, as if he is trying to avoid me.

You really were right. He doesn't need you. He doesn't want you.

I know I'm the one who pushed him away but a part if me wished that he still wanted me.
Even a little would have done fine.

But now I'm alone.
Who am I kidding?
I've always been alone, but, at least with him it didn't feel like it.

I just give a small nod and and go to leave but before I cam reach the door he calls out to me, "where are you going? You hit your head pretty hard, it would be dangerous for you to leave. Come here"

I'm hesitant before I go over and sit down nex to him again.
I feel him slightly pull me closer to him so that I'm slightly cuddled up to him.

I sigh and move closer to him, resting my head in his chest, wrapping my arms around him.

I missed this.
I missed the late night cuddles.
I missed the small tired conversations.
I missed accidentally falling asleep with him.
I missed the small random kisses and 'I love you' s.
I missed him.

It's been over a week since I got to enjoy this.
I notice tears starting to blur my vision so I quickly blink them away.

Neither of us say anything as he holds me and I hold him.
It's a calming silence.

I soon end up falling asleep in the comfort of his arms.
I never want this moment to end but I know it will have to.

***

I wake up cuddled up to Shoto's side on the couch as he holds me with one arm.

I look at the time and see that we only have twenty minutes until school starts.
Shit.

I quickly get up, waking him up in the process and run out the door to get to my house, despite the pain in my head.

***

I walk into school and sit down in my seat.

I don't know why but I don't have a good feeling about today.

As I wait for class to start I take out my notebook and start writing,

Sometimes I feel completely alone and others I know I'm not.

It's scary waking up and not feeling right in your own body.

Do you know what that's like?