d_s_t_e's Wattpad Reviews

The Secret of Absol by RiverIvy [Unavailable]

The Secret of Absol is a Pokémon fanfiction about two sisters living in Vermillion City. Their lives are seemingly ordinary, but the Absol who stands off in the shadows watching them knows that disaster is just on the horizon.

One of the best aspects of this piece is its descriptiveness, not just in good visuals and sensory details but also in the completeness with which it took time to describe things like Pokémon battles and scenery and even normal or everyday things that really come to life as a result. The prologue is a perfect example of this. The descriptions of the night immediately brought the scene to life while simultaneously building the perfect tone and atmosphere.

The prologue is also good because it's interesting and mysterious and suspenseful, and all of these continue to slowly build throughout. It's definitely a great way to start a piece, and it ends at a great time: right after the main character has been introduced and on just a hint of the tragedy that is yet to come.

After the prologue, though, the pace definitely slows down. The next few chapters really just focus on the ordinary lives of the main character and her sister. I think it's great that the author has such a complete picture of what her characters' lives are like because it has the potential to create real depth and complexity in and around the plot, but I would have preferred for that plot to be just a little more present in some way during these chapters. Some possiblities that I thought of were a subtle building of suspense, perhaps by really playing up that dramatic irony that comes from the reader knowing that something terrible is going to happen while the characters themselves have no idea. Another possibility might be the development of some minor tensions, perhaps between the characters or perhaps even within the main character in the form of an internal conflict or a powerful desire or longing. Either one of these, or a number of other small things, would have been really great to retain that reader interest that the author captured in the prologue.

I think the place where the plot really kicks up is right near the end of the book. The last few chapters are definitely my favorites, particularly Chapter 18 where I think the plot hits its high point. Even in that chapter, though, there were parts that felt a little slow to me. I think the entire last section could be really great if it was streamlined a bit to take out what's not completely necessary and shorten sections that can be. The one thing I think would be really great is transitioning certain parts from scenes into summaries, which... I haven't written a chapter in my Writing Tips book about that yet, really? Ok, stay tuned for a chapter on that to be published soon.

I also liked the way the plot was resolved in the final chapter; it felt like a fitting end to what had come before. Another thing I really loved was the epilogue, which is mysterious and intriguing and has an excellent final sentence. That definitely left me wanting to read the sequel!

One other concern I had was with the way that the characters reacted to certain situations. I'm not going to get into any spoilers here, but I will mention that, in some places, they seemed spot on, like at the beginning of the very latest chapter that's been published (Chapter 14). In other places, though, the characters' reaction to something seemed odd to me, for one reason or another. Those are places where I really would have liked to see either something different or a fuller explanation that would have shown why those reactions actually make perfect sense. This was particularly true for me in Chapter 15, where the actions of two characters seemed unusual at different points.

When I was rereading the last section for this update, though, I really focused in on another part of that chapter, which relates to Absol. The information there opens up some really fascinating possibilities, which I would have enjoyed seeing our main character consider more deeply. Also, if read in a certain way, a possibility opens for an explanation of at least one of the things I mentioned above that would resolve my earlier point and also be really chilling. The story could easily go deeper just by introducing that, even though I don't know whether it's what the author intended.

Now I'd like to briefly get into some of the finer points. There are several pieces of the story that really shine through in their own way, like the great way the author handles tension while a pokeball shakes. Is the Pokémon caught or is it not? Another example is the fact that all of the characters that are introduced have very clear and distinct personalities, which is something that's really important for a good story. Character relationships are also handled very nicely.

As always, there were a few errors/typos here and there, but they weren't very bad at all. Overall, it's one of the better stories I've seen in terms of this. There were also some smaller points where I picked up on what basically amounts to just a beginner's mistake, like a minor point of view issue and a passage that might have been improved with a little "show don't tell". This didn't really surprise me, as this is the first piece of this length that the author has ever written, and, for a beginner, I would say that, overall, she is really pretty good.

It's also worth noting that, as this story is not very heavy on the aspects of Pokémon like battling that can be difficult for non-fans to easily understand and instead places a lot of focus on more universal themes and small twists on the familiar, it's one that could easily be read by a more casual fan or even someone with just limited knowledge of the Pokémon franchise. This gives it, potentially, a slightly wider audience. For the person who reads a lot of Pokémon fanfiction, this piece could also be a breath of fresh air in terms of something just a little different.

Now, you might notice that I mentioned a sequel. As of the time I'm updating this review, the original book has been completed, and, according to the author, the sequel is just about to begin. So if you read the first book and enjoyed it, stay tuned for the second to come soon!

** Published in July 2014 **