White Impact- Niam

White Impact: Ch. 9- Rock

Niall’s POV

I had fallen asleep last night in Liam’s arms. It was hard not to just take full advantage of the situation and do dirty things to him, but somehow I managed to resist. I wake up first and he is still asleep. My head is on his chest and I like the sound of his heartbeat. It sounds like music. I turn to face him. His features are as if when God was making him he spilled the whole bottle of adorable in. I really just love him. Is that weird? That I fell in love with my best friend? Especially since he’s a guy?

I think about how he comforted me so much last night, and not just last night but pretty much every time I’ve ever cried. He really is my shoulder to cry on. I really look up to him for that. The dream still freaks me out though. It has to mean something, because otherwise it wouldn’t be reoccurring. I’ve never in my life dreamed the same thing twice.

My eyelashes brush against his bare chest like butterfly kisses. His eyes open a little and he takes a deep breath, stretching. The way he wakes up is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. Maybe besides when he’s actually asleep.

His hand travels through my hair and down my back. It sends a shiver of pleasure through my entire body. Liam smiles at me and it’s like an explosion of emotion, I have no other way to describe it. I wonder what our families would think of this… or Liam’s family more like. I don’t really talk to mine anymore. Are they even still alive? Gah, stop thinking about that Niall. Of course they are, this only happened to the east coast of America. Yeah, that’s it. His fingers continue to caress my back as he speaks, “What are you thinking about?”

I don’t know what to tell him. I can’t just tell him I was just thinking about how both of our families are probably dead; it’s not that simple. No, I have to choose my words carefully. “I’m just insecure.”

He rolls his eyes. “I don’t know what for.” He combs his fingers through my hair and I just sigh. He always knows what to say. “What are you insecure about anyway?”

I have to pause and think about that. What am I insecure about? There’s only one answer, “Everything.” His eyes look troubled. It was the only answer that I could come up with that wasn’t a lie. I’m insecure that we’ll actually survive this shithole of a place. I’m insecure about what society will think about me and Liam. And honestly, I’m insecure about my own fucking body.

It seems like the same things are running themselves through his head too. His eyebrows are furrowed and he has his thinking face on. I have seen that expression more times than I can count. Usually it only stays on his face for a few seconds, but this time it seems like it’s plastered. I reach my hand up and gently place it on his right cheek. He seems to snap out of his trance. “Liam are you okay?”

“Yeah I was just thinking about… stuff.” I nod. I know exactly how he feels. I think it’s something we have in common. It’s hard not to think about all the shit that has happened over the past few days. I think a lot of people would break under the stress. Heaven knows I have been reduced to freaking tears more than a few times. It is not only hard to think about it, it is also hard to keep composure about it. How many people would honestly keep so calm under these circumstances? The world seems like it’s fucking ending and here we are in a hotel room cuddling.

Honestly, if it weren’t for Liam I would probably be dead. He is my rock. I can cling to him as the fucking river of disasters tries to swallow me. If it weren’t for him I’d probably drown in it. It seems like there is just something out to get me lately. I sound like a proper loony right now. Oh well. It’s true. It just seems like nothing goes right. Especially for me. I fucking faint like a girl at the worst times.

All at once I realize Liam’s eyes are on my face. He looks worried. Oh no, I’ve worried him again. The feeling of guilt instantly rushes over me. I feel like I should be sent to the principal’s office or something. Maybe I actually do deserve to be punished. I feel a frown creeping to my face and I make no attempt to stop it. “Niall?” I look back at Liam and his frown matches mine.