boundaries [s.m]

chapter twenty-three

you may hold my hand for a while, but you hold my heart forever - Unknown
-
"hi jane," aria says gently, sitting down at the bar, just before 9am. "can i have a tea please?"

"of course sweetie," she replies back, preparing a mug of tea. "how are you today?"

"nervous," she admits. "i sent shawn a letter a few days ago, telling him to meet me here if he wanted to. i'm not sure if he's going to show," she mumbles. "do you think he regrets ending things?"

"maybe, whenever he comes over, he always looks so empty, so quiet," she says gently, handing aria her mug of tea. "tell you what, why don't you go and grab a booth? i'll tell shawn where you are."

"if he comes," aria whispers to herself, before nodding, and walking to one of the empty booths, so they can at least get some element of privacy.

she settles down, placing her tea on the table in front of her, looking out of the window, whilst drumming her fingers on the wooden table. was he actually going to turn up, or was he just going to leave her there alone?

thirty minutes pass, and aria is still waiting for shawn. a small sigh passes her lips, and she frowns softly to herself, looking back at her now empty mug of tea.

"-where is she?" she hears, making her heart beat faster. she looks up, seeing shawn hugging jane, before turning around, and walking up to aria.

time freezes, and it's as if both of them are e only two people in the café. her heart skips a beat, seeing him wearing the hoodie she gave back to him. shawns eyes widen at her, his own heart racing, as he slides into the booth opposite her.

"h-hey," he stutters. "sorry i'm late, i didn't know if i was gonna turn up, but i went on a walk and ended up here."

"i don't blame you, don't worry," she mumbles back, looking up, and finally getting a good look of shawn. he's definitely looking more tired, after all, aaliyah said he hasn't been sleeping properly. "so, uh, how have you been?"

"around, i guess," he shrugs, sending her a nervous smile. "i'm heading to london next week, so that should be fun. what about you?"

"nothing much, i graduated, so that's great."

"yeah, i know, congratulations!" he says softly, making her smile slightly. "how was the ceremony?"

"eh, i didn't really care. all i wanted was the graduate, school has tired me out," she chuckles gently. "shawn i-"

"no, hear me out," he sighs, looking back at her. "aria, i had no right to even talk to andrew about ending things without talking to you, heck i had no right to assume how you were feeling. if i'm completely honest, i really don't know what it's like to be you. at all. i'm sorry for assuming that i did know what you wanted, and i'm sorry for leading you on. it was a complete jerk move, and i apologise prohibitly."

"profusely," she corrects him, making him chuckle softly. "and i understand, shawn. at the time, it was such a mess, and i completely sympathise with you, and what you were feeling. yeah, it did hurt me a lot, and it still does, but we can easily forgive and forget, right?"

"right," shawn nods, smiling solemnly at the girl he loves. "so are we back together?" aria sighs, looking down at her hands, before looking back up at him, a serious gaze in her eyes.

"i still don't trust you fully, shawn, not after what happened," she says, crushing shawns heart. "but i think if we continue to talk to each other, and-and continue to rebuild our relationship, there could be a chance we could get back together. if you want that, that is."

"i do," he nods, feeling more optimistic than sad. "thank you, aria, thank you so much."

"it's no problem," she says gently, reaching for his hand, and placing it in her smaller one. "i really want to fix this, shawn. after what you wrote to me, i couldn't help but think about my future, and i want it to be with you."

"you do?" he asks with a small smile. "because aria, i want that too."

the two of them share small smiles with each other, rejoicing in their happiness, well, their way of numbing their unhappiness. either way, both of them were feeling okay again, but couldn't help to feel nervous about the future, and nervous about what could possibly happen if they don't fix things.

"do you need a ride back home?" shawn asks her gently, as the two of them walk out of the café, back into the warm june of toronto.

"no, it's fine," she says to him. "thanks though."

"no problem," he says, shooting her a smile. "listen, i was thinking, are you free tomorrow night? i'd love to take you out for dinner." a smile appears on her lips, and she looks up, nodding.

"i'd like that," she confirms. "pick me up at 7?"

"of course," he responds. "i'll see you then, then?"

"mhm," she nods. "tomorrow," she folds her arms, and the two of them look at each other, seeing a different side of themselves that they have never seen before. shawn liked this feeling, and so did aria. "shawn?"

"hmm?"

"can i have a hug?"

"mhm," he nods, shuffling closer towards her, and wrapping his arms gently around her smaller frame, pressing his lips softly to her rosy cheek, before pulling away, and cupping her cheeks. "i'll see you tomorrow, yeah?" aria nods, squeezing shawns sides with her hands, as he leans down, kissing her forehead softly. "get home safely, text me when you do."

"yeah, see you tomorrow," shawn steps away, shooting her a smile and a wave, before turning around, and walking off into the distance, shoving his hands into the pockets of his hoodie.

aria sighs gently, turning the other way, and walking to the nearest train station. although she wanted to take things slow, she hated how awkward they were being.

she wanted so much more.