Freak Show (Carnival Series book 1)

Chapter 22

It was dark in my room, the night swallowing me whole. The room was hot, yet I still lie beneath my sheets, shivering. My legs were cradled against my chest, my chin nestled in the crook. I couldn't sleep. My mind was racing with too many things. Usually, on a night like this, I would go get Isabelle, and she would sleep in my room. I get up to open the door, but my hand hesitated just above the handle. She's dead. I walk back over to my bed and lie on top of my blankets, still shivering. 

Trevor thinks I cheated. He thinks I went behind his back, and kissed one of his best friends. And, I guess I did. But we hadn't even really kissed yet. We were just friends. So why was he so jealous? So angry about this? I'm not even on speaking terms with Jc anymore. I sat up and crossed my legs. My hands rested on my knees, the scars from falling and scraping my knees bumpy under my hands. He really doesn't trust me, doesn't he? My eyes were watering, but it was too dark to see the effects of it. 

I looked down at my lap, I could feel my hair falling in front of my face, tickling my nose. Both of my hands pushed the hair back, lingering on the top of my head. I let go of my hair, and covered my eyes. It didn't make much of a difference from what I could see, but at least my hands could catch the tears that were falling from my eyes. 

How did Trevor even find out? Who told him? That has to be why he was acting so strange. He doesn't believe me. Trevor won't listen to me, and is probably angry with Jc. It's my fault. I shouldn't have kissed him back. I betrayed Trevor's trust. But we weren't even a whatever yet! We were just friends! I went to his house everyday to hang out with him. Not make out with him. I honestly don't think he really gets the right to be angry. I wipe my tears away, and get under the covers again. I am going to try to talk to him in the morning. I look at my alarm clock. 2:30. Well, maybe in a few hours. I shut my eyes, and drift off into a dreamless sleep. 

I stood in front of Trevor's familliar house. His dog, Tucker, was lying in the grass in the yard. I took in a deep breath and pressed the buzzer. Trevor opened the door. He sighed. 

"Can I talk to you?" I ask him. He grabs his shoes that were next to the door and steps outside. "Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that Jc kissed me, and I kissed him back. I'm sorry I never told you. It was just one time, and it won't happen again," I try to explain. He stood with his arms folded across his chest, looking at me in disbelief. I gulped, he probably heard it. "Who told you?" He looks down at his shoes. 

"Jc. He said you kissed him, but he didn't even want to. He said that you were trying to do more with him, but he left," Trevor explained. I couldn't think. That doesn't even sound like something Jc would make up about anyone. And yet, here was Trevor standing in front of me, telling me what was told to him. Why would Jc do this? I shook my head. 

"Trevor, why would I do that? When we found you, I told you that I loved you. And you know what?" I stepped closer to him. I rested my hands on his arms. "I still do," I say. He shook his head and backed up two steps. 

"I doubt that," He spits. My hand moved to my chest, like they do in the movies. I didn't mean to, but the sudden shortness of breath was startling. 

"I would never do that! I only thought of Jc as a freaking friend! I don't even think that much of him anymore!" I say to him. "Trevor, he lied to you. He was angry because I yelled at him. He's jealous, and he's trying to keep us apart," My voice cracks. "Trevor," I whisper. He shakes his head and walks back inside. The door slams, leaving me feeling like trash on his doorstep. I turn and look out at the street. A woman was jogging with her dog. Across the street, a man was taking out the garbage. I walk away from the house. I walk down the road, towards the O2L house. I walk past three neighborhoods, and two parks. I walk up to the house, and ring the doorbell until someone answers.

"What?!" Connor shouts as he opens the door. "Oh. Hey, Andraya." 

"Hi. Is Jc here?" I ask him. He nods and opens the door wider to let me walk in. I found Brittany seated on the couch. "Brittany? What are you doing here?" I ask her. She looks up at me and laughs nervously. 

"Oh," she says. "Uhhh, Connor! Do you wanna say it?" She looked at Connor. He shook his head. 

"She's your best friend. You say it." He tells her. She sighs. 

"Connor and I are...Dating." She says quietly. I laugh really loud. 

"You're kidding right? I mean, a freshman in highschool can't date a 21 year old. It's illegal!" I was still laughing, but no one else was. I stop, realizing they weren't kidding. "Oh. Well, have fun." I say to Brittany. "Where's Jc?" I ask Connor. 

"In his room," Connor tells me. I thank him and walk up the stairs. When I reach his door, I pause. Whatever was about to happen was either going to be catastrophic, or help us. I knock three times and fold my hands together. Jc opened the door, and grunted in frustration. 

"Why are you here, Andraya?" He asks me, clearly irritated by my prescence. I roll my eyes.

"I'm here because of the lie you told to Trevor." I say to him. Jc smirks. 

"What lie?I told him the truth!" My hands balled into fists. 

"Goddammit, Jc! You told Trevor that I tried to force you into having sex with me! What the hell?! I would never do that!" I stepped closer to him, shouting in his face. He stood still, not flinching once. 

"So? I figured that if he's gonna be mad about our kiss, that he should at least be mad at you too. You're not innocent in this situation either," He reminds me. 

"Yeah," I say. "Yeah, I kissed you back. You were the one who kissed me in the first place! And it was nothing! You ran away from me! It doesn't matter!" I huff. "You're just angry with Trevor because he and I are dating. It's your own fault you can't get over yourself. Stop blaming me, and leave Trevor out of it!" I stomp away, and leave the house. I need to calm down, so I'm glad I have along walk back home. 

When I got home, I sat down on the couch and turned on the T.V. It was still on Disney channel from Isabelle. No one has watched anything in here since she died, I guess. I leave it on the channel and watch whatever was on. I think it was this show called Liv and Maddie. My phone buzzed in my pocket. I took it out and saw Trevor had  texted me. 

Come outside it said. I got up and walked over to the window. Trevor was standing on the curb. I put on my converse and went out to him. He engulfed me in a loving hug. I hugged him back, and nestled my chin in the crook of his neck. 

"Jc told me what really happened. I'm sorry I didn't believe you," He says into my ear. He lets go of me, and pulls a small bouquet of cat's tails. I laugh and take them. "Tyler suggested I get them. They're his favorite," he laughed with me. 

"Thank you. I forgive you," I grab his face and pull it closer to mine. "I still love you," I whisper. I kissed him gently, letting him fully understand. His hands move down to my waist, gingerly holding me like fine china. I drop the cat's tails, and hold his elbows. He deepens the kiss, and leans forwards, making my back arch slightly. His hands rest on the small of my back, helping to keep me up. I pull away and look him in the eyes.

"So, what do we call us?" I ask him. He purses his lips and looks at the grass and back to me. 

"How about...Freak show?" I laugh and kiss his nose. 

"Sure," I say to him. "We're just a couple of freaks."