Life works in weird ways.
Five years ago, I was just an up and coming American artist missing my best friends. Four years ago, I was jobless in Korea, staying in my best friend's dorm. Four years ago, my best friend confessed to me and asked me to be his girlfriend. Three years ago, I signed with BigHit Entertainment as a solo Korean artist. Two years ago, I won my first award at the Seoul Music Awards. A year and a half ago, I started on my first full album. Six months ago, I released my first full album as a Korean solo artist.
Now, I'm sitting backstage at my very own concert as an idol.
I was in my dressing room alone, laying on the floor and staring at the ceiling. Not only was I nervous but there was a lot going through my head.
I had never been on tour before this because I never got to releasing a full album. I had always worked on one but something always stood in the way of it getting released.
I suddenly knew how Namjoon felt while he was on tour. I had been on tour for two and a half months and I was missing him like crazy. I missed being around all of the boys. I hadn't been with them in a while because we were always practicing when the other was free.
Is this career even worth it? I hadn't been on a proper date with Namjoon in years because of the policy. I felt like we were slowly drifting apart as the days went on. We almost never talked anymore. It was always the occasional "How are you doing?" or "are you taking care of yourself?". It hurt me to know that we were drifting apart. He had taken care of me and been there for me ever since I met him. I didn't want us to become strangers. I didn't want to lose my only family. They were all I had left.
I felt a couple tears fall onto my cheeks. I didn't move to wipe them away, I just laid there staring at the ceiling.
Suddenly the door to the room opened. I bolted upright into a sitting position. It was Jinwoo. He walked over to me and extended his hand to me without saying anything. He helped me to my feet as my staff came into the room. I walked over to the small room in the back of the dressing room and closed the door. I changed into my opening outfit, which hung on the far left side of my portable outfit rack. Once I was changed, I opened the door and went back into the main dressing room. I walked over to one of the stylist chairs and sat down. My makeup artist and my hair stylist quickly went to work. I stared at them through the mirror on the vanity in front of me, watching them in awe as they worked.
After a few minutes, my phone started ringing. I picked it up off the vanity and looked at it. Jin was calling me. I hesitated for a second before answering the call and putting it on speaker.
"Hello?" I answered.
"Hey. I know you're getting ready for a show right now but I need to ask you something." He said.
"Okay..." I said, suspicion in my tone.
"When's the last time you talked to Namjoon?" He asked.
My heart skipped a beat. Was something wrong??
"I texted him this morning before I had to rehearse. I haven't received a response, probably because of the bad signal in here. Why? Is everything okay?" I replied.
"I don't know. He's been acting weird. We were recording a dance practice and he kept messing up every thirty seconds. He's been angry a lot too." Jin said, concern laced in his voice.
I started to worry even more. Why was he like this?
"Do you know what he's doing right now?" I asked.
"I know he's in his office but I don't know what he's doing." Jin replied.
"Do you know if he has his phone on him?" I asked.
