How did I get here?

Chapter 26

It's been a month since my first appointment with Mrs. Ricks and I've made some progress, and by that I mean I can play the piano without sobbing my eyes out. I've spent countless hours in court and Mr.Ryland thinks we can end it, in the next few weeks. He told me Kriss's and Maxon's divorce would be done around the same time, like I cared. I moved over to the mirror and said all the positive stuff my therapist told me to say.
"I'm talented, I'm worth more than my looks, I have value, I am honest, I am charismatic, and I can achieve goals." I smiled at myself, I was actually starting to believe some of these things.
"I've had a thought," Maxon bust through my door saying.
"Umm don't you ever knock?" I ask.
"Sorry," he says and walks back out the door closing it and knocking. Mrs.Ricks said I should try to talk to Maxon without yelling at him and kicking him out of my room. She says it will help with trust and remembering who I am.
"I wonder who's at the door," I say sarcastically as I open the door. "Oh look it's you." I know I sound salty, but I was still having a hard time dealing with him.
"Is someone in a bad mood?" He asks in a slightly joking tone, lately he has been trying to make our relationship as light as it used to be.
"Don't test your luck," I say.
"Sorry," he says looking down at his hands.
"Anyway you had a thought," I say.
"Oh right," he says. "Will you have dinner with me?" He asks.
"No absolutely not," I say, I needed to not yell at him, but that didn't mean we had to spend time together.
"Why not," he asks.
"First of all neither of our divorces our over," I say.
"Well no not like a date," he says. "Just a time to talk and spend time building trust."
"The answer is still no," I say, I do wish I didn't have such hard feelings towards him, but I still couldn't get over what he said on national television. "Thank you for your time Maxon, but please leave." I say ushering him out the door.
"I'm leaving," he says and walks out the door, which I quickly shut behind him so he won't try to come back in. I decide to take a walk in the gardens and try to clear my head, everything is so confusing right now. I feel like once my divorce is over, that will be one more thing off my list of things to do. I approach the door, so eager to get outside.
"You look like a kid at Christmas," a familiar voice says from behind me. I turn around expecting to see just Aspen, but instead I see Aspen and Lucy.
"I really need some fresh air," I say.
"Care if we join you miss?" Lucy asks.
"Why not," I say and we all head outside. We walk in silence for a moment and I can see something is bugging Aspen, like he has something he really wants to say.
"I feel like this is not my place, but I really have to know. What's going on with Maxon and you?" Aspen says.
"Aspen that's personal," Lucy says and he wraps an arm around her shoulders.
"I'm sorry I'm just concerned about you Mer," he says.
"Well I don't totally hate him anymore," I say.
"Oh that seems promising," Aspen jokes and Lucy raises a hand to her mouth to cover her smile.
"It's basically a fairytale," I say.
"I hate myself for saying this, but I have to say it. He cares and you need to look at him the way you used to." He says.
"That's really not your place," I say.
"I know," he says. "But it's true."
"Aspen has the best intentions at heart," Lucy says.
"I believe that, but still not his place."
"Alright even though I'm right I'll back off," he says.
"Oh my gosh," I say and shake my head, but Aspen is just smiling. "Oh I get what all this is about." I say.
"What is it about?" Aspen asks.
"Over the years you and Maxon have developed this weird bromance thing over being in love with the same girl or whatever and now your trying to be his wingman." I say and fold my arms, what was I going to do with these boys.
"Wow you caught us red handed," Aspen says.
"Come to think of it America is right," Lucy says quietly.
"Thank you Lucy," I say.
"Maybe for my new job I'll become a detective," I say.
"Or Queen," Aspen says while coughing.
"Shut up," I say.
"I'm just trying to help you find your future Career," he says.
"Oh is that what your doing," I say sarcastically.
Lucy takes Aspens hand and looks at his watch, "oh we've got to go, we have dinner with my Dad tonight."
"Right," Aspen says.
"Bye," the both say to me and walk briskly back to the palace. I shake my head thinking, Aspen completely forgot about that dinner. I continue walking in the garden, enjoying a little peace and quiet. I round the corner and see Kriss sitting on a bench blissfully content and reading her book. Kriss is actually the exact person I want to talk to right now. I walk over to her and interrupt her reading. I gently tap on her shoulder and she turns around.
"Hello America," she says.
"Hi can I talk to you," I say.
"Sure," She scoots over so I can sit down.
"Actually it's kind of personal can we do it somewhere more private?" I ask.
"Of course," she says and hops up. "Where to?" She asks.
"Let's head up to the princess suite," I say. We walk back to the palace and up all the stairs into my room. We sit on the bed and I take a few breaths knowing that this will be an awkward conversation.
"What did you want to talk about," she asks.
"This is going to be weird, but Maxon." I say.
"Tell me everything," she says.